


under the blinding lights

by gummyjennie



Category: BLACKPINK (Band)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Mentioned TWICE Ensemble, More Fluff, Red Velvet, little angst, top jennie is my other brand
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:54:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 35,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23706460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gummyjennie/pseuds/gummyjennie
Summary: in where jennie tries to figure out the how’s and the why’s of feelings when she enters the world of fwb with park chaeyoung(mostly the how’s since the latter is the easier one to answer)
Relationships: Jennie Kim/Park Chaeyoung | Rosé
Comments: 65
Kudos: 180





	1. the contingency of cards

going through college takes a lot of stress on jennie’s life, especially being a third year economics major with a minor in business management. being the only daughter of the multinational company of the Kim Industries, she’s expected to take the role of CEO in just a few years. not only that, the pressure is reaching new levels when she, and along with her friends, gets to be included in a job in creating a program that’ll attract new students during the biggest college event of the year.

so yes, jennie is stressed. times ten.

luckily, her friends, god bless their hearts, decided to take her out to a club blocks away from the campus. they, consisting of jennie, jisoo, nayeon and and jeongyeon, enter the club and immediately spots an empty table near the bar. 

“we’re gonna go and grab us drinks first, alright?” nayeon says loudly over the thumping bass drops of the music, “i’m taking jeong!”

jennie gives her a thumbs up, and glances at jisoo and sees that she’s already scanning the area for, she guesses, potential hook ups for the night.

“we just got here and you’re already searching?” jennie scoffs, a hint of smile on her ruby lips.

jisoo flicks her hair, “need myself to get laid.” then takes a look at her friend, “don’t act like you didn’t plan on that too.”

jennie laughs, a playful glint visible on her eyes, “i figured i’d down some shots first before i go hunting.”

“we’re back!” jeongyeon shouts while carrying a tray of shot glasses, a bowl of cut lemon, and a plate of salt.

“bottoms up, my best friends!” nayeon hollers as she fills up the shot glasses with alcohol in her hand.

the four juniors quickly gulp down the shots until they all had their buzz. at the fifth shot, jennie slams her glass on the chair, laughing at something jisoo said when she suddenly spots the most alluring woman talking to the bartender by the bar.

the said woman seems to be comfortable with the bartender, smiling and giggling while she seems to wait for her own orders. while jennie contemplates to approach the woman, she fails to see the incoming slap by a smirking nayeon and two laughing idiots.

“what the hell was that?!” jennie hisses as the quick pain travels on her shoulder.

“i just asked you something, yet you seem so focused somewhere else.” nayeon snickers, “who are you even looking at?”

“no one,” jennie scoffs as she struggles not to stare at the woman by the bar earlier.

jeongyeon trails her eyes to the direction jennie was looking at, and suddenly whistles and smirks at the cat eyed girl.

“the blonde girl, huh?” the tall girl teases, as jennie tries not to seem like she’s interested. 

“do you know her?” jennie asks after she dons her shot.

“i’m a p.e. major, remember?” jeongyeon pointedly looks at her.

“yeah, and?” she raises her eyebrow.

“don’t know what her name is, but she went on one practice with the track team.” the tall brunette rolls her eyes.

“oh, so she’s sporty?” jisoo excitedly asks. “jennie has a thing for muscles and blondes.”

“i don’t have a thing.” she defends though it falls to deaf ears.

“anyway, i recognize her because the track team asked us if they could borrow the pool for their practice or some shit.” jeongyeon takes her shot and immediately sips the lemon and salt. “knew you shouldn’t have got this shit, nay.”

“oh please, you’re such a cry baby.” nayeon refills their glasses once again, “drink up, then we dance.”

as they take their last shot, jennie sneaks a look at the woman by the bar and is a bit disappointed that she isn’t there anymore. she shrugs it off and lets herself be dragged on the dance floor by her best friends. with the buzz already humming in her nerves, they all danced together with the bass of the music thumping on her head like a catapult. she laughs when she sees jisoo and nayeon pulling off ridiculous dance moves and jeongyeon recording the whole thing. 

somewhere in the start of the weeknd’s blinding lights, while she’s grinding playfully with her friends, someone accidentally bumps her by the shoulders. she turns and catches a blushing blonde by the waist.

“i’m sorry! my friends sort of bumped into me and i lost a bit of balance.” the blonde shouted over her ear, flushed cheeks under the blue neon signs.

“i’ll forgive you if you dance with me.” jennie smirks, the buzz returning full force when she sees the blonde laugh and continue to dance sensually and playfully at the music.

“not wasting any time, i presume?” the blonde raises an eyebrow, a grin on her pink lips.

“with a pretty girl like you in my arms?” jennie chuckles, “i don’t think i would.”

“sin city’s cold and empty,” the blonde sings at her since she wrapped her arms around jennie’s neck somewhere at the middle of the first verse.

jennie slowly pulls the blonde close by the waist, her eyes still on the blonde’s. her gaze flickers to the full and inviting lips, mouthing the lyrics of the song. 

“no one’s around to judge me,”

she pulls her a little bit closer, if possible, until her lips are a breath away and her eyes are little darker than they were before.

“if you don’t kiss me right now,” the blonde mutters quietly, making jennie laugh.

“like me that much?” she teases as the blonde frowns cutely.

“that’s hardly unfair since i’m not the one who keeps looking by the bar earlier.” the blonde wickedly grins, effectively making jennie stutter.

“i mean,” she coughs and quickly makes up a lie, “i thought the bartender was giving you a hard time.”

the blonde only hums, a teasing glint still on her eyes, clearly not believing the brunette. “okay, miss?”

jennie leans near to the blonde’s ear, “kim jennie. so, does it mean you were staring at me too?” she leans back and snickers at her shocked expression

“w-what?” the blonde sputters, “no, i was-“

“how about you give me a name and then we’re even?” she raises a bravado, even if a weird hesitation just slips in her a mind.

“oh god, you’re not one of those people who’ll drop the lines, ‘so i know what i’ll be screaming’ later, right?” the blonde groans, and jennie laughs.

pretty and funny? what kind of luck did she got today?

she purses her lips and hums, “do you want me to do that?”

the blonde starts to sway, her arms still around her neck, and stares in her eyes, “the pick up line part?”

“the part where you imply i’m taking you home after this?” 

“i did not imply that,” the blonde hurriedly says, “the pick up line did.”

“so you don’t want me to take you home?” jennie narrows her eyes, and then pouts when she received no answer, “and i thought i was doing well.”

“if you played your cards right, i might tell you my name and address.” the blonde cocks her head to the right.

“that’s a fair deal.”

two hours later, jennie stumbles in an unknown apartment with the blonde trapped between her and the door.

hot and sinful.

that’s some of the words jennie could describe at the moment as she continues to kiss the blonde with such fervor. with her shaking hands, she searches for the zipper of the blonde’s dress and growls when she can’t find it. 

“shit,” jennie hears the other girl mutter as she opts to slide her palms upwards on the blonde’s thighs.

she breaks off the kiss and starts to place her lips on her neck. she nips and sucks until she finds the weak spot just below her jaw, her hands dangerously close to ripping the flimsy lace material underneath.

“bedroom, where?” she lifts her head and asks, her hands fully cupping and kneading the plump behind.

“on your right,” the blonde gasps hotly against jennie’s mouth when does a quick press on the part where she wanted it the most.

“or i could take you on this door right now.” jennie hungrily says, her eyes only on the flushed cheeks and the fresh bruises on her neck.

“bedroom. now.” 

the blonde drags her towards the room and jennie knows that she played her cards perfectly to even land in such a state.


	2. aftermath of rendezvous

so here’s the thing, jennie doesn’t do  
cuddles.

after the sex, she usually wakes up earlier than the sun and sneaks out quietly in order to avoid awkward conversations and situations that’ll lead to complications. sometimes, she’d leave a small note that says, “last night was fun ;)” or something similar to that. but never her number.

so when she slowly opens her eyes, it takes a while for her to settle in her surroundings. she notices that she’s in a baby pink colored room; she sees a tall, polished, brown shelf filled with books and knick knacks by the corner, an acoustic guitar propped up by the electric keyboard stand, a work desk with cluttered hard bound books and papers, a strewn tubes of acrylic paints and tainted bodies of brushes, and a canvas set on the other corner of the room.

the walls are filled with fairy lights and polaroids lined messily yet still beautifully. there are a bunch of papers stuck near that looked like it was drawn by a five year old, the color of the crayons seemed new, and it seemed to be stuck by a child due to the misplaced tapes by the corners of the paper.

the room was cute, and what you certainly expect from an art student.

at the mention of art, jennie suddenly tenses as she notices the state she is in right now. she feels an arm around her waist, warm and soft breaths on her neck, and a weird sensation in her chest starts to grow when she takes a look at the sleeping face of the blonde she went home with last night.

the blonde, chaeyoung, which she knows now after she practically forced it out by tickling her during a break of their steamy sessions, is now dozing off beautifully that it’s a sin for someone to look so ethereal in the morning.

jennie continues to dote on chaeyoung’s appearance, starting from her nicely shaped eyebrows, to the gentle slope of her nose, to the roundness of her cheeks, and the plump lips that she remembered she thoroughly enjoyed kissing.

she struggles to contain the smirk on her lips when she sees light pink to dark purple marks all over her neck, and hopefully, her chest. her view is sadly obstructed by a white button up that she remembers wearing last night.

“so she wore my clothes,” jennie muses in her head, and at the same time, notices that she too, is wearing an unfamiliar shirt. she then looks for her phone, and shifts a bit, careful to avoid waking up the blonde and grabs her phone by the table by her side. she ignores the messages from her friends, promising to text back later, and sees the time a quarter to seven in the morning. 

so she woke up late, no big deal, they finished at four when chaeyoung begged to stop and, by the way, promptly ignored her proud smirk, raised the white flag due to exhaustion.

and it’s not like this is the first time she woke up late.

(it is, she only wakes up late to classes, not one night stands, but her mind was so clouded by that weird tingling on her chest that she forgets that small tidbit.)

jennie feels a soft whine followed by a pull by her waist, as if they aren’t cuddling already. she shifts and sees a small frown forming in between the blonde’s eyebrows.

“why are you awake and what time is it?” she hears chaeyoung grumble.

(she blatantly ignores that annoying warmth by her belly.)

“sorry, habit.” jennie turns and also pulls the blonde closer. “it’s almost seven, still sleepy?”

she feels chaeyoung nod, “someone wore me out that i had to shed a tear just to prove it.”

“that was kinda mean, who even did that?” jennie pretends to be flabbergasted.

“this girl whose height is small and has a smaller set of teeth,” the blonde jokes.

“bet with all that insults, she still did a pretty good job, huh?” jennie proudly states.

“maybe,” the blonde yawns and laughs at the deadpan expression of the brunette. she then groggily says, “i need sleep first. set the alarm at ten then let’s get breakfast.”

“what do you mean by ‘breakfast’?” jennie almost slips out the question, but stops herself because of-

of what?

she creaks an ‘okay’ and minutes later, she notices the blonde’s even breathing by the crook of her neck. she even notices that she just started unconsciously stroking the blonde’s hair.

what the hell is going on?

despite the confusion, jennie makes no move to get out of bed and out of the room, and the apartment. being with chaeyoung, right here beside her, with her casually holding her as she sleeps, feels so domestically normal and she doesn’t even question the reason behind it.

at least, not yet.

all she knows, just ten minutes of pondering in her beautiful and amazing mind, she falls asleep next to chaeyoung, breathing in the smell of apples on the pillows and sheets.

——————————

jennie groans in irritation as she feels a heavy weight on her tummy. she hears a small giggle and thinks that maybe she’ll fucking punch nayeon because waking her up like this does not look good for her vlogs.

“didn’t know you were so grumpy in the morning.”

she snaps her eyes open and sees a gorgeous blonde leaning her face down with that dumb charming smile and her bright attractive pair of eyes.

the said blonde now rests her forehead on hers and jennie is immediately overwhelmed by the smell of apples and mint, and wow, how is someone more prettier than her in the morning?

“you’re awake,” jennie states dumbly, her mind still putty due to the amazing view she got the moment she woke up.

“i am,” chaeyoung’s eyes dart to her mouth and jennie immediately covers her own. “no morning kisses?” she pouts at the brunette.

jennie shakes her head, “i don’t do morning kisses”, at the tip of her tongue, but what came out was, “do you have a spare toothbrush?”

what the hell.

as chaeyoung leans back and steps out to the bed to open one of her drawers, jennie sits up and really, who wouldn’t stare at someone’s long creamy legs early in the morning?

“bathroom’s just by the hall, i’ll be in the kitchen.” chaeyoung gives jennie the unopened toothbrush right before stepping out of the room.

hence, the start of the panic.

what the heck is happening? how is she still here? what happened to ‘no staying over at one night stands’? why didn’t she sense the overwhelming dread she usually feels when she gets caught sneaking out and the other asks if they could talk? 

and why does this feel okay?

oh, crap.

jennie immediately opens her phone and texts her friends on the group message.

the best kim: holy shit.

second best kim: ???

it girl nayeon: did u just woke up...

second best kim: i think she just did

coolest jeong: jennie kim staying over at a o.n.s??? a miracle.

it girl nayeon: details!!!!

second best kim: bet 10k won jennie’s panicking rn

coolest jeong: u dont need to bet when jen’s obv doing it

it girl nayeon: jen u still there?

the best kim: yea gtg, tell u l8r

jennie throws her phone to the side, grabs her toothbrush and walks to the bathroom. she opens the light and sees the results of her wild rendezvous. she’s fairly proud of the artwork painted on her skin only to remember moments later, while brushing her teeth, that she has a photoshoot with a make up line that their company is currently managing.

after brushing her teeth, she steps out to the kitchen where she can hear lana del rey’s voice flowing out of the room and sees a relaxed blonde humming to the song as she flips another pancake.

jennie clears her throat, and leans on the table, where she can clearly see a surprised expression of a blonde with a cute apron on.

“good morning, hope you like pancakes,” chaeyoung says, smiling warmly at her.

“i do,” jennie lamely retorts and attempts to clear the awkward silence, at least for her, “i didn’t know you cook.”

“i mean, we literally just met yesterday,” chaeyoung chuckles, “but yeah, gotta learn to not survive on instant ramen, right?”

“right,” jennie just nods, not really relating due to her often eating out on one of the hotels their family owns nearby, or at some fine restaurant or anywhere because she can afford it everyday.

“can i help you with anything?” she offers, stepping by the blonde and looking over her shoulder.

she hears chaeyoung hum, “you can set the table, it’s almost done, anyway.”

minutes later, she can’t help but moan at satisfaction after the first bite.

“wow,” jennie praises as she chews on her pancake. “i really got lucky on you.”

chaeyoung laughs, “well, is it good?”

“yeah!” she enthusiastically nods, “it’s been a while since i ate a homemade breakfast. usually i eat at the ho-“

she pauses, not really sure if she could blurt out stuff like that without sounding so cocky and arrogant about her family’s accumulated wealth.

“ho what?” chaeyoung asks, confusion on her face.

“never mind,” jennie waves it away, and takes another bite.

“is it hotel?” she pauses mid bite, and stares at the blonde’s face. “you do know you’re well known at the uni for being a chaebol.” the blonde amusedly states.

jennie looks away and gazes at her plate, “i don’t really wanna sound like, you know,”

“well, i don’t see you as ‘you know’,” chaeyoung pokes her hand with her finger. “i think you’re nice and sweet.”

“really?” jennie looks up, and sees sincerity on the blonde’s doe eyes.

“yeah,” chaeyoung then suddenly grins in mischief, “though a bit aggressive in bed.”

jennie bites her lip, a smile threatening to out itself, “is it aggressive-good or very good?”

chaeyoung laughs, “wow, really?”

“i don’t hear any answer, miss park.” she raises an eyebrow and takes a sip on her coffee.

“very good,” chaeyoung mutters before eating a piece, and while jennie has a perfect vision, she isn’t sure if she saw a flush of pink at the blonde’s cheeks or it’s just a trick of light.

“so, thank you for the breakfast,” jennie sheepishly says as she stands at the middle of the living room. “you’re a good cook.”

“you’re welcome,” chaeyoung lets out a small laugh when she sees jennie fidget. “i’ll walk you out, come on.”

jennie bites her lip, thinking if it isn’t too weird to be friends with someone you slept with. she contemplates on how to get her number without sounding like a overly excited teenager going out on her first sleepover.

“so i was thinking,” jennie turns to chaeyoung as she steps out the apartment. “if we could, you know,” she shrugs, “be friends?”

she bites her lip as chaeyoung casually leans against the doorframe and crosses her arms, a purple bruise just peeking under her white shirt.

yeah, friends my ass. jennie snarks inside her head.

“friends, huh?” chaeyoung grins, mischief obvious behind her innocent brown eyes.

“why? are you thinking of something else, miss park?” she teases back as she continues to flick her stare between the color of chaeyoung’s eyes to the splashes of red and purple on her neck.

“i’m certainly gonna think about something else if you keep looking at me like that,”

jennie shifts her gaze elsewhere, though the churn on her stomach and the urge to take her again on the door remains the same.

“see you soon, jennie kim.” chaeyoung kisses her cheek, her eyes filled with amusement and mirth.

jennie watches the door close, her hand on her pocket and the other on the strap of her bag. she entraps what happened earlier in her mind, smiling stupidly to herself on how her heart felt the small flutters as the blonde leaned in for a kiss on the cheek.

as she gets in her car, she curses to herself and leans on the wheel as she groans when she realizes that she never got her number.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> placing notes in each chapter is kinda tricky on the phone so i switched on laptops and yeah im a dumbass lmao
> 
> hope i did ur expectations well, if not, then ok,,,,
> 
> have a good day!!


	3. the bossy protagonist

okay, jennie admits there are times where she forgets the concept of time and space and hunger.

like, during prelims, she got holed up in the library for almost sixteen hours everyday for five days, and all she had was four trips of water refill each day. jeongyeon practically had to drag her away from the library to force her to eat, change into a clothes where she at least looks presentable, and get some few hours of shut eye.

(the exam results were amazing though, and she slept for a day and a half after the last exam.)

and during the time where her and jisoo were cramming for a project that was fifty percent of their whole semester. she admits that she would’ve gone on and on crouching on her desk filled with stacks of paper, and eventually get to the point where she forgets to just take a break if it weren’t for jisoo’s incessant groans of how college is such a bitch and that she’s tired and hungry.

(they finished it with an a minus, not bad for a crammed paper that jennie literally lost interest after receiving it and slept for the whole day.)

and now, she’s in a similar situation, but slightly different in the settings.

instead of being holed up in the library or her loft, she’s stuck in the student council room with jisoo, jihyo, joohyun, namjoon and sehun. with the rest of the members done for the day, it’s up to the leaders for the final inspection of the programs for next month’s biggest college event.

after jennie’s eleven am class, she went straight to the student council room and been stuck at it for at least seven hours and maybe counting.

she staples the bundles of paper that reads BUDGET in the front and passes it to the treasurer, seokjin, who in return, groans in exhaustion. she offers a consoling smile and pats his back before going back to her seat to stretch her legs. she takes a look at jisoo who is now snoring on the floor with her bag as her pillow and jacket as her blanket.

joohyun, the current president, sees the obvious fatigue on the faces of her juniors and deems that it’s time to wrap things up and settle things tomorrow.

“so guys,” joohyun starts and the rest subtly tenses, even jisoo who suddenly wakes up and sits upright, in fear of upsetting the intimidating president. “how about we all take a breather and come back here early tomorrow? let’s say at nine thirty? sound good?”

murmurs of agreement flood the room, and they all begin to pack up their stuff, and ready to call it a day.

“i thought we’re gonna have to sleep here for the night,” jisoo yawns and stretches her back. “you wanna get some sandwich or something?”

jennie shakes her head, “you go ahead, i have to accompany joohyun unnie to the art department to drop a few papers for the event.”

“alright, i’ll see you in the morning!” jisoo shouts as she walks out of the room, and bids farewell to the two tall boys who tiredly waves back.

a comfortable silence settles in the room as jihyo, joohyun and jennie continue to clean up and organize the work they’ll be doing tomorrow, along with the occasional chatters of their daily lives.

“jen? you still up for the art department?” joohyun asks by the door.

“yeah, unnie, i’ll be with you for a sec.” jennie replies back.

“i’ll be going ahead guys, catch you all tomorrow!” jihyo grins and walks out the door.

jennie zips up her bag and walks together with joohyun to the art building. “are you excited that this stress will be over in a month?”

“very,” joohyun groans, “i feel really bad for seungwan, i keep falling asleep on our movie nights even if she insists that it’s okay.”

“every movie night?” jennie raises an eyebrow.

joohyun nods, “every night. i honestly feel guilty about it. it feels like i’m losing time for her because of this dumb event.”

“well, i don’t know much about relationships, but i do know seungwan unnie.” she quips, “i’m sure she understands. she likes you a lot.”

joohyun offers her an amused smile, “you know, i heard from a little birdie that you stayed over at your little adventure until the morning. is that true?”

“is that little birdie, jisoo, whom i’m gonna kill later?” jennie sardonically smiles.

“jisoo or nayeon or yeri? all same to me.” the president waves it around as they turn around the corner.

“of course, nayeon told yeri.” jennie sighs. “what’d she tell you?”

“nothing much, just that. they didn’t give me a name though.” joohyun stops in front of a brown door, and knocks.

“that’s because i didn’t tell them.” jennie says behind her senior.

“so, you’re not telling me too?” joohyun faces her and crosses her arms.

“and risk on you telling your girlfriend that might be spilled to yeri and then to my friends?” she pauses, “no, i won’t.”

“i’ll be able to tell, though.” joohyun smirks, “i’m good at that.”

“yeah, right-“

the door opens with a cute short haired girl cuts jennie and greets them. “hi! what can i do for you?”

“yeah, is byulyi around? i have the concepts the she asked for.” joohyun asks, and the short haired girl steps aside.

“she just went out for a coffee run and she’ll be back in a jiffy. come in both of you!”

jennie follows joohyun inside and looks around to see various unfinished portraits stacked up against each other, fresh plain canvases set up against the windows, and buckets of paint scattered around the floor.

“i’m gonna say sorry for the mess, but you know how messy it is here.” the short haired girl sheepishly says, “i’m son chaeyoung, a freshman!”

“bae joohyun,” the president nods.

“nice to meet you, kim jennie.” she offers a smile and continues to look around the unfinished projects. “it looks like someone can’t decide what portrait they should do.”

chaeyoung laughs, “a lot of students here are a bit indecisive on their works so they leave it here, hoping some miracle could help them finish it.”

jennie walks around the room a bit more, letting joohyun and chaeyoung do the talking. luckily the freshman is talkative and the president won’t feel awkward.

she continues to look around and sees a painting of a garden in oil canvas. she admires the details the artist had put on it, to the intricate strokes of the leaves and the grass, to the delicate touches of each flower is remarkably done well. she sees a signature at the bottom of the painting, ROSÉ, and lets out a smile at the silliness of having a flower at the end of your signature.

“small chae, i’m back!”

jennie turns around and her eyes widens at the sight in front of her.

park chaeyoung in the flesh.

after coming home from the amazing night, she maybe searched for the wonderful girl online and found zero results in it. she has little bit of hope on bumping on her in the school, but with thousands of students coming in and out of the campus, her chance of finding her again is slim to none. so, actually seeing her again, has given her a lot of relief.

“good evening, unnie! i had to run out and get coffee for my chaeyoung twins.” byulyi jokes to joohyun, setting the beverage on the table beside her.

jennie ignores the rest of the conversation and continues to stare at the blonde who now is equally surprised to see her. she sees her plump lips slowly form in a grin, before approaching her in a confident stride.

“and here i thought i wouldn’t see you again,” jennie first speaks, letting her eyes roam all over the tall blonde in a messy shirt with the bottom part tied at her waist that reveals a very toned stomach that she clearly remembers, and a high waisted shorts that shows her lean legs.

“miss me that much?” the blonde’s eyes twinkle in amusement, “what are you doing here?”

“just accompanying pres,” she shrugs, “you didn’t give me your number.”

“i am aware of that, yes.” chaeyoung nods.

“so?”

“so what?”

jennie rolls her eyes and grabs her phone out, “number, now.”

“aren’t you a bit bossy today?” the blonde teases, completely ignoring the phone in front of her. “how about we have dinner later? my place?”

jennie gazes around, and takes note on the unfinished poster by the table. “you look like you’re busy, so another time.”

“oh right,” she watches the blonde pout, and a feeling closely related to stopping a child have their candy eaten for being a good kid nags her insistently.

“how much time do you need to finish your thing?” jennie huffs out, and tries not to melt that the blonde is now smiling widely.

“an hour tops, just need to finish the base.” chaeyoung chirps out before grabbing a key from her bag. “this is the key to my apartment, you still remember it, right?”

“yeah, but” she nods, “i could wait here and-“

“no, you go ahead, i’ll catch a ride with-“

“i’ll wait for you.” jennie hurriedly says. “it’s really no big deal. i can wait outside.”

“or you can stay here and watch talk chaeng do her magic,” she turns to look at a smirking byulyi and an amused look from joohyun.

“she does so well with her fingers.” byulyi snickers, clearly ignoring the blonde’s protests.

“yeah, i noticed,” jennie mutters as she watches the blonde’s cheeks flush with baby pink.

“guess i’ll be going now,” joohyun nods at everyone else except her, whom she sends a sly smile. “don’t be late tomorrow, jennie.”

“i won’t, unnie.” she waves at joohyun as her senior walks out of the door.

“oh geez, she was so intense, i thought my heart was gonna drop.” byulyi let out a sigh she was holding in. “how do you deal with that?”

“loads of practice?” jennie shrugs and smiles, “i’ll be doing my homework by that table, is it okay?”

“yeah, go ahead,” chaeyoung walks over and checks for any fresh spills. “it’s clean.”

“thanks,” she grins, “go and do your magic hands.”

“very funny, ahjumma.” chaeyoung rolls her eyes, then laughs after when jennie calls her out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it’s more of a filler chapter ahehe,,,
> 
> have a good day!


	4. the emergence of intimacy

jennie considers herself a woman with an impeccable taste, especially with an exemplary knowledge in her field due to early age, and a set of high standards that rarely one ever passes.

she admits that she can appear as distant and aloof but, rarely does it on purpose, and rather, was raised in a way in preparation for their huge business expenditures. 

so, now, she has no idea why she finds chaeyoung chopping onion and garlic so fascinating.

jennie figures that it’s been a long time since she saw someone actually  _ cook _ , due to her usually living off at various food establishments, whether it be the fast food or the fancy type, and instant noodles and frozen nuggets.

she also considers that maybe it’s the way chaeyoung does it in an appealing manner. 

or the blonde herself is the appealing one.

but really, who would blame her to be enticed by chaeyoung who somehow fucking  _ glows _ under the warm yellow kitchen light. despite the golden hair tied in a messy bun, her white shirt already splattered with various acrylic paints, she still appears like she just stepped out of a magazine.

of course, she is aware of the fact that she just completely disregarded what chaeyoung was asking her and proceeded to just blatantly ogle at her instead.

“stop staring at me, small teeth.”

jennie can’t help but smile at the fact that she just made the blonde blush with a simple action.

“i want to apologize for that, but i don’t think i should when i find it adorable that you shy away so quickly.”

she rests her head on her hand that rests by the kitchen counter, and watches at how chaeyoung easily stirs the kimchi on the pan, and adds an additional oil on it, then dumps the rice on it.

“are you complimenting me so you could get some tonight?” chaeyoung leers at her.

“maybe,” jennie shrugs, “or maybe i really just find you beautiful, who knows?”

“just shut up, and set up the plates.” she sees chaeyoung roll her eyes, though a small smile on her lips still doesn’t escape her sight.

“so, why art?” jennie asks, swirling the wine on the wine glass.

it was just after dinner when she saw an unopened bottle of wine by the drawers, and luckily, chaeyoung agreed on drinking it as long as she replaces it with another bottle.

chaeyoung licks her lip before answering, “i find it fascinating to be able to recreate what you’re exact emotions are. or your dreams or visions or anything.”

“did you always wanted to study art?”

“i do, but i also would like to study music.” 

“oh, you’re a musician?” jennie turns her body to the blonde.

“maybe,” chaeyoung’s lips curve upward, “i play guitar and piano, and now, i’m teaching myself how to play the drums.”

“wow,” jennie leans back, amazed at the blonde’s talents, “you must sing too, right?”

chaeyoung sips on her wine, “i try, but i’m not that good.”

“can you sing for me?” jennie moves closer to the blonde, placing her chin on her knees.

“no,” the blonde laughs it off. “i don’t want to embarrass myself to you.”

“why so?”

“well,” chaeyoung rests her head by the couch, and stares at jennie. “you might bleed your ears and run away.”

“i doubt that,” jennie deadpans, “just one chorus, okay? then i won’t bother you again.”

“i don’t know, jen-“

“i’ll let you top.”

“sex is not the answ-“

“i’ll let you sit on my face.”

“oh my gosh, i did not even ask to do that-“

“please?” jennie pouts and moves even more closer to chaeyoung, her hand sliding up the blonde’s sleep shorts, and squeezes the inside of her thigh.

“that’s so unfair,” chaeyoung softly gasps, and jennie sees her pretty brown eyes darken. “just the chorus, then we’re done?”

“i’ll decide when we’re done or not.” jennie murmurs, her thumb lightly brushing the bottom lip. “please, sing for me.”

she moves away to give the blonde space, and stares at her as chaeyoung ponders on what song she should sing. she struggles to not let out a grin when she sees the other glaring at her, and then after a few moments, she sees her take a deep breathe and sing.

“You and I together

It just feels so right

(as soon as chaeyoung opens her mouth, jennie knew that the blonde is simply put, incredible. the honey voice completely overtook her senses and all she could hear now is the sweet tone and her own heart thumping roughly against her chest.)

“이별이란 말을해도

그 누가 뭐라해도 난 그댈 지킬게

“You and I together

내 두 손을 놓지마

안녕이란 말은 해도

내게 이 세상은 오직 너 하나기에

okay, that’s it for today.” chaeyoung quickly drinks her wine, wanting to drown her embarrassment in liquor.

“that’s-“ jennie is simply at loss for words, as if her speaking abilities have vanished into thin air, her language in korean, english, japanese and chinese have malfunctioned, and all she can feel is the overwhelming need to kiss the blonde.

and so she does.

her right hand gently slipping through the golden locks and tugging it at the right amount of pleasure, she takes the opportunity to slide her tongue as chaeyoung moans softly on her lips. she begins to feel consumed once again by the blonde.

she willingly wants to drown in the soft velvety moans of pleasure, the smoothness of the porcelain skin, the warmth of her breathe, the scent of green apples, the silkiness of her hair.

she wants to drown in chaeyoung.

“jennie-“ she hears the blonde gasp out as she nips at the already swollen bottom lip.

she hums in reply, already peppering kisses by the elegant slope of her neck, and removes the shirt that disturbs her travels.

“bedroom-“ chaeyoung tightens her grip on the brunette’s waist.

“too far,” jennie huffs, then places a fresh mark just beside the healing one.

she hears chaeyoung release a breathy moan, and continues to nip at her neck and collarbones, leaving behind another trails of pink and purple.

“you’re buying me new sets of concealer.”

jennie hums and stares at chaeyoung’s dark eyes, as her hands pull down the annoying shorts that hinders her from giving everything to the blonde.

she traces her lips against the blonde, letting a chuckle out as those pretty brown eyes immediately closed, “you’re such a sucker for my lips.”

with the shorts gone, as well as the shirt, she gazes with wonder on how she even had the opportunity to be with someone as beautiful as the blonde whose cheeks are brazen red, skin painted with passionate colors, and swollen lips drawing in hot gasps.

“shut up, and kiss me.” chaeyoung gruffly says, pulling the shirt off of jennie right before kissing her senseless.

easy to say, she sang even more than just a verse at that moment.

and jennie can proudly say that park chaeyoung just gave her a hell of a concert that night.

—————————

“your name at australia was roseanne park?” jennie scowls lightly at the blonde, “that’s so, girly.”

“your name is literally jennie with an ‘e’,” chaeyoung pushes the brunette’s shoulders lightly.

“blame my mom, okay? she wanted a name that’s easily written.” she says as she plays with the blonde’s fingers.

“do you ever had any dreams besides taking over the company?” chaeyoung asks as she repeatedly pokes a finger on jennie’s cheek.

jennie hums as she moves her face away and quickly bites the poking finger, a flood of warmth rises on her chest as she hears the blonde laugh, but ignores it once again.

“for someone with a small set of teeth, you sure bite a lot.” she hears chaeyoung murmur.

“i don’t hear you complaining about that earlier,” jennie raises an eyebrow as she watches the blonde throw a leg over her and snuggle on top of her.

“that’s different,” chaeyoung rests her forehead on the brunette’s. “so, dreams?”

jennie ponders for a while, pulling the sheet further to cover their naked bodies, and then rests her hands at the gentle curve of the blonde’s spine.

“don’t laugh, okay?” she tells chaeyoung who nods fervently, “so, maybe, i did dream on becoming an idol.”

“really?” chaeyoung smiles widely, “me too!”

“i figured,” jennie chuckles, her fingers tracing random shapes and letters on the soft skin. “i think you’d be perfect as an idol”

the blonde laughs at that and sits up, “thank you, but imagine if we were in one group.”

“i am imagining,” jennie mutters as she takes in sight the masterpiece in front of her.

“not that, you perverted old lady-“

“you’re a year younger than me!”

“but like, if we were in a group, you’d easily be the leader.” chaeyoung says while she grabs a random sweater by the drawer.

“really now?” jennie raises an eyebrow, “what makes you think that?”

the blonde motions one of her hand at the economic major’s face, “it’s the aura.”

“what aura-“ jennie holds the younger girl’s wrist, then pouts. “why are you putting a sweatshirt on?”

“because it’s cold, silly.” chaeyoung laughs before grabbing another sweatshirt and passing it to the brunette. “here, put it on.”

“you just gave me your clothes,” jennie dramatically notes, placing her palm on her chest. “is this like official or something?”

“shut up, it’s not.” the blonde laughs as she dons on the sweatshirt, “and about the aura, you have this attention-grabbing air around you.”

jennie puts on the sweatshirt, “are you saying that i’m appealing?”

“you’re just fishing for compliments, miss kim.”

“well, if you keep letting it out like that, you know that i’ll grab it.”

“as i was saying,” chaeyoung shakes her head, “you just have that aura around you, that’s all.”

“well, if there’s anyone who could beat me in appeal, it’d be you.” jennie lays on the bed and pulls the blonde along with her.

chaeyoung scoffs, a smile on her lips, “no more, i’m too sore.”

“that good, huh?” jennie smirks, pride fills her chest.

“you’re such a cocky midget,”

“yah, what did you say?”

“a very very cute midget, is what i mean.”

jennie nods haughtily as she snuggles into chaeyoung’s soft hair closer, and listens when the blonde starts to hum a soothing tune, her fingers drawing figures on the back of her spine.

that warm sensation at her chest comes back once again.

it’s really only a matter of time until she understands what it meant.

and what she’ll do about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like this story is going slow, and i’m trying to fix chapter 6 bc that’s mostly the part where the complicated shit comes and im so excited for that but i’ll try to keep this at just like 10 chapters or so? idk ahhajask
> 
> if u notice, i’m using big bang theory as an inspiration for the titles haaaaaa (or atleast i’m trying to lol)
> 
> HOPE YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER pls leave sumn comments <3 tysm <3


	5. the band origination

the first person to actually know the full details and witness the symbolic event, as jennie’s friends call it, is nayeon.

and may she add, nayeon knew about accidentally.

emphasis on accidentally.

it was thursday afternoon when jennie received a call from her home. usually, she would be in her last class for the day, and fortunately, that class got cancelled. so after her morning schedule, she immediately went home to sleep.

when she picks up the phone, still groggy from the nap, she didn’t expect to hear the voice that she thoroughly admires and would be pleased to hear every now and then.

“hey, is it a bad time?” she hears a voice meekly ask.

“uh,” jennie groans and checks her phone, “rosie, what’s up?”

“were you sleeping? i’m sorry for disturbing.” the younger girl quickly apologizes. “i’ll hang up now, i’m really so-“

“hey, no, it’s alright.” jennie interrupts while she sits up on the bed, “do you need anything?”

“it’s just,” she hears a pause, “i forgot to bring an umbrella, but it’s okay, i’ll just try with uber again. i’m sorry for disturbing you-“

“where are you? i’ll pick you up.” jennie fixes the sheets as her feet touch the floor.

“do you know the cute bakery with a dog on the sign?”

“yeah, i’ll pick you up there, okay?”

“thank you, jen. stay safe.”

by the time she parks her car in front of the bakery, she immediately grabs the umbrella and coat for the blonde.

“put this on,” jennie says as she gives the coat to the blonde. “you must be freezing.”

“not really,” chaeyoung mutters, but the tremble in her lips still noticeable. “let me hold the umbrella.”

“let’s go,” jennie ignores the blonde with a smile on her lips, and grasps her hand with hers. she opens the door for chaeyoung, and swiftly walks to her side after she closed it.

“it’s pouring even harder than before.” she takes note of the angry gray clouds covering the sky. “you should stay over to my place, it’s a lot closer. i’ll bring you home once it stops raining.”

“thank you,” chaeyoung says as she rubs her hands for heat. “my uber app kept crashing, and i really don’t want to bother my best friend in the studio. i’m sorry i disturbed your sleep, too.”

“stop saying sorry, okay? i’m glad that you called me.” she snatches the cold hands and holds it with hers. 

she blows hot breaths into their hands and rubs the heat in, all while, she doesn’t fail to notice the red hue covering the blonde’s cheeks. she looks up and smiles widely when she catches the girl staring at her.

(a tiny part of jennie hopes it’s because of her, but she knew it’s really just wishful thinking and the fact it’s so goddamn cold.)

“am i making your heart beat faster, miss park?” the older girl jokes.

“in your dreams, jennie,” the blonde easily deflects, also taking her hands away.

“let’s go then,” jennie starts her car and drives away with a subtle smile on her face.

when they arrived at jennie’s place, the first thing chaeyoung says is something along the lines of “you didn’t tell me you lived in a penthouse” and “i think your dog loves me”; she really can’t remember because she suddenly found chaeyoung too beautiful while the blonde stared at the raining view of seoul.

with the city lights twinkling softly and the rain staining the high windows, she found it hard to look away from the blonde when she looked so ethereal and otherworldly. 

she only snapped out of her reverie when chaeyoung asked her something.

since it was the first time that she brought chaeyoung in her place, she was a bit awkward around her. after she offers the blonde a set of clothes and shows her where she can freshen up, she tries to calm the nerves that were surprisingly present in her state when the blonde was gone.

she didn’t know why she was nervous in the first place. is it because it was the first time she brought someone who is- 

(a bed buddy slash friend? honestly, she doesn’t know exactly what they are yet.)

-by her place? maybe, or maybe not.

she knew that putting more thought into the why’s would get her nowhere so she grabs a bottle of wine and pours a hefty amount in her wine glass. 

later that evening, the rain hadn’t stopped falling, and jennie knew in her mind that chaeyoung might stay over.

she presses pause on the remote, the screen frozen at the scene where rapunzel steps on the grass for the first time, and knows that the blonde was puzzled. so she decides to just ask since thinking about a question won’t get her answers.

“it’s still raining, so,” jennie clears her throat, and stares at the fabric of chaeyoung’s sweater. “would you like to stay in my room? i’ll take the guest room.”

“why would you take the guest room when i’m the guest?” the blonde asks with a puzzled expression on her face.

“i haven’t really cleaned that room yet,” jennie shyly mutters.

“well, i refuse,” chaeyoung furrows her eyebrows adorably, “i’ll clean it up for you.”

jennie shakes her head, “no, you’re the guest, you shouldn’t clean.”

chaeyoung bit her lips, “how about we just sleep next to each other?”

jennie raises an eyebrow and the blonde let out a light giggle, “just sleeping, miss kim.”

“just sleeping?”

the blonde nods her head fervently, “with no funny business.”

“alright, rosie, no funny business.” jennie says nonchalantly with a smile on her lips.

——————

no funny business did happen.

at least for fifteen minutes.

“i can’t believe this.” chaeyoung’s voice muffled against her neck.

jennie lets out an amused laugh, “really? you can’t?”

“shut up.”

“i did, but you made a move first-“

“stop talking.”

“-and asked me to do something, which i did-“

chaeyoung covers jennie’s lips, “stop gloating, for the love of god.”

the brunette removes the hand on her lips and places a kiss on the palm, “i’m not gloating, rosie.”

“you are,” chaeyoung narrows her eyes, “stop with what you’re doing with your cat eyes.”

“what’s with my eyes? and cat eyes? jinja?” 

“you’re doing that twinkling and it’s annoying stop it.”

“...”

“...”

“do you have to cover every single thing that annoys you?”

“yes.”

with jennie’s eyes covered, she blindly pulls chaeyoung’s neck and kisses her until they’re both breathless and dizzy with little sparks of glee in their veins.

“hi,” jennie whispers against the blonde’s lips, her gaze solely on the glimmer of bliss on the pretty brown eyes.

“hello,” chaeyoung laughs, “you’re weird.”

“makes you more weirder for having sex with the weird one” jennie runs her thumb on the base of the blonde’s spine.

“why do you have to say it so crudely? you can just say ‘spent the night.’”

“and not see the adorable blush?” she kisses chaeyoung’s cheeks. “never.”

(maybe this is the moment where she can freely admit to herself that maybe she liked chaeyoung just a little bit.)

((or maybe not.))

—————

so, nayeon.

what can jennie tell about her?

well, she’s been friends with her since high school, along with jisoo. 

and the fact that the ims have been partners with the kims (jennie and jisoo’s), it was no doubt that the two (already determined) heiresses and one possible heiress (jisoo isn’t sure about working for her family and her siblings yet) would form an unbreakable bond.

(she met jeongyeon when nayeon was the first to try out the dorms in college and she was her roommate. hence, the p.e. major is a part of their little group.)

((nayeon only lasted for six months in the dorms and invited jeongyeon to be her roommate in a flat near the campus.))

but nayeon, safe to say, is the more dramatic version of jisoo.

the bunny teeth girl maybe more impulsive, more emotional, but has the most love to give. she knew she would do everything for im nayeon, because she knows that the younger girl would do the same.

she loved im nayeon to death.

but this?

she might fucking kill her.

———————

jennie was in the middle of a very exciting breakfast, with chaeyoung on her knees, and obviously, having the time of their lives, when suddenly, im nayeon barges inside the room shouting that she’ll need to stay at jennie’s place because she can’t stand jeongyeon being a stuck up asshole.

with little time, she pushes off chaeyoung, but sadly, hasn’t got the time to pull up her shorts.

so, when nayeon spots them, she swears that it’s the first time, in all the years of their friendship, that she has seen the energetic bunny absolutely still.

“w-wh-“ nayeon sputters, her mouth still hanging and eyes still wide as saucers.

jennie pulls up her shorts and helps the semi-mortified blonde to stand up. she offers an apologetic gaze, which the latter appreciates but still doesn’t help when her face is literally burning with shame.

she then, faces her catatonic best friend, and sighs. “what are you doing here, nayeon?”

the dark haired engineer still gives out a sputtered response.

“i think that’s my cue to leave you guys alone,” the blonde whispers on her ear.

“what about breakfast?”

“i’ll eat it in your room,” chaeyoung, with a tomato like blush on her whole face, picks up the plate of toast and coffee, “it’s nice to meet you, nayeon. i hope we can meet again in a more better situation.”

jennie considers wrapping her hands around her best friend’s neck, but stays in her place because she’s really pissed that she didn’t get to come.

(and she wants it to be done as fast as possible and go back to the blonde.)

when she hears the door close, she glares with all her rage on the said girl, “give me one good reason why i shouldn’t push you off this building.”

“oh my god,” she hears nayeon mutter, “that’s park chaeyoung.”

“oh, now you know her name?” jennie rolls her eyes. “you didn’t even knew her in the club!”

“there were many blondes in club, okay?” nayeon shakes jennie’s shoulders. “daebak, i can’t believe this.”

“i still haven’t heard your reason.”

nayeon visibly gulps moments later, she doesn’t admit it out loud, but sometimes, jennie really scares her.

“well, i needed a place to stay for a while.”

“and? jisoo’s place is near your apartment.”

“free food downstairs?” nayeon refers to the grand hotel dinner area. “enough about me, spill everything and leave no details or i’ll march over there and tell chaeyoung your dirty little secrets.”

twenty minutes later, with lots of squeals and cheers from nayeon, jennie can proudly say that she survived the ordeal with a few slaps on her arms and shoulders. although she left out a few details, it still didn’t stop nayeon from trying to pull out some few juicy info from her.

“so,” nayeon plays with her eyebrows, “how was it?”

“what?” jennie asks with a blank expression on her face.

“you know,” the bunny teeth owner points her head towards the dumpling’s bedroom. “that. how is it?”

jennie scowls, “yah, that’s private!”

“oh come on,” nayeon whines, “just a little bit of detail. this is park chaeyoung we’re talking about.”

“is she that famous in the campus?” jennie raises an eyebrow.

“you are aware of the different reasons why we’re known, right?” nayeon continues after seeing jennie nod. “well, for her, she is known as the darling of art department. like literally, she’s the purest angel ever, sources say. also, she’s on the dance troupe with my future wife, mina.”

jennie sips her tea as she takes on the new information in her head. and while she takes no notice of someone’s reputation, it still came with a slight shock as she finds out about rosie’s name being known that widely.

and somehow, it sort of brings a tiny pride that she has unknowingly captured the so called ‘darling of the art department’.

“so, are you like going out or something?” nayeon suddenly asks, snapping jennie out from her thoughts.

“no,” jennie hurriedly says, “we’re just-“

“just what?” the engineer probes.

“friends, i think.” the economics major mumbles in her mug, then glares when she hears nayeon laughing.

“omo?” nayeon laughs boisterously, “why are you like that?”

“oh screw yourself, you haven’t even asked mina out yet.” jennie rolls her eyes. “and it’s been, what, three years?”

“yah! it’s different, okay? i’m just waiting for a sign.” nayeon defends herself.

“and what sign is that?”

“that she’s not straight.”

jennie bursts out laughing at that, “okay, i need you to get out right now.”

“wae?” nayeon smirks, “are you gonna continue what i saw earlier?”

“yes,” jennie flatly replies and points at the door, “now, out.”

“i’m gonna report you to the police! you stained the park chaeyoung!” the buck teeth student claps in humor.

jennie darkly glares at her, “yah, go ahead and try.”

nayeon laughs meekly and stands up, “you know i’m just joking. can i still stay over?”

“no,”

“but-“

“yeah, whatever, just get out right now.”

“adios, my horny best friend who bagged the good girl of the campus.” nayeon smirks and walks out the door, and not without a twirl.

jennie sighs loudly, just enough to hear the little giggles from the hallway that leads to her bedroom.

“how much did you hear?”

“just enough,” the blonde plops at the couch next to her. “i didn’t eavesdrop, by the way. i just happened to be done with breakfast.”

“i apologize for my friend’s antics,” jennie gazes at her, “auntie dropped her head at the toilet when she was born.”

“ah, my friends are also like that too.” chaeyoung chuckles, “i have to head home to prepare for my classes.”

jennie nods, “i’ll just change and grab my keys.”

“you don’t need to drive me home,” the blonde stops her from getting up.

“it’s no hassle, don’t worry.” the older girl insists, “i have this huge craving of strawberry milkshake at the diner near your place also.”

chaeyoung fake gasps, “who would’ve thought that you’d choose a simple milkshake over a hotel milkshake.”

“is it really that shocking?” jennie amusedly asks, right before going inside her room to change into something fashionably comfortable.

“with your dumpling cheeks? not really.” chaeyoung grins as soon as she emerges from the bedroom. “you ready?”

“says the one with the cheeks of a chipmunk,” jennie teases back, a tiny rush of affection running through her as the blonde laughs.

————————

after jennie drops off chaeyoung at her place, she drives towards the campus where joohyun called an emergency meeting. as she enters the stuco room, she can hear the shuffling of papers and jihyo talking on the phone with her stern and intimidating voice.

“what do you mean they’re ‘too pressured’?” jihyo harshly asks on the phone. “we told you three months ago!”

jennie shot a look of confusion to joohyun who was currently massaging her head. she pulls out a chair beside the president’s and takes in the chaos of the room.

the room is almost packed with students per department submitting their share of idea for the college fair. she easily spots jisoo stapling papers, having no trouble ignoring the basketball team’s pleas to have a shirtless shooting contest. the rest of the student council members; jihyo as the vice president, haseul as the secretary, and seokjin as the treasurer, are also busy with the event that is happening in three weeks.

while her and jisoo are only there to help set out the events for attracting new students, it still doesn’t make their jobs easier as many wanted to have a spot for the line up to increase their attendees in their respective department.

“what happened?” jennie murmurs as she scans the room almost full of students.

“the local band that we booked for the main event suddenly cancelled,” joohyun suddenly smacks the table loudly, her face perfectly still.

the whole room flinches, not daring to take a glance at the terrifying president.

“let’s not hurt the table, unnie.” jennie slowly takes the senior’s hand and places it on her lap. “i’m sure jisoo and i can think of something new.”

“yah! jendeuk!” 

“have you tried asking if the dance troupe is available?” jennie asks joohyun while ignoring jisoo’s shout from the other side of the room.

“they already have a slot for the event” jihyo says as she sits across jennie. “i asked momo about it, and they apparently can’t do another because they have an important practice for a competition during the main event’s time slot.”

“seulgi said that too,” joohyun sighs, “they already booked the choreographer and can’t reschedule because it seems that the choreographer is really on demand.”

“i have an idea,” jisoo suddenly sits beside jennie wearing an excited grin, “how about setting up a band?”

“a band?” jennie furrows her eyebrows.

“yeah, we’ll hold an audition and see who fits the spot.”

“that is a pretty good idea,” jihyo mutters.

“and it came from jisoo,” joohyun even agrees.

jisoo pouts, “irene unnie a meanie.”

“it’ll be a great promotion for the school too,” jihyo purses her lips, “the sooner we hold the audition, the sooner we get the band.”

the president gives an semi-apologetic smile to jisoo before announcing to the room to spread the word that there’ll be an open audition for a band for the college fair in the next few days.

jennie silently watches as joohyun barks out orders to each representative of the departments about the play, when an idea suddenly dawns upon her.

maybe she could get rosie to be the main vocalist for the band?

considering on how amazing the blonde’s voice is, they’d be crazy to not let her be part of the band.

the only problem now is how to get her to audition.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> small dash of fluff before i introduce chaos <3
> 
> this chapter is more of a filler so :]
> 
> leave ur protests and comments (i prefer anything) below c:
> 
> have a nice morning!!
> 
> (im just about to go to sleep lol editing sucks asf but if there are still errors, cut me some slack ily)


	6. the realization of a conundrum

by no means that park chaeyoung can say that she is extremely self confident.

perhaps, she is like everyone else.

she can be confident at what she does best, but when she believes that she’s just on the scale of average in something, she doesn’t say that she’s okay at it.

with art, for example, she can sufficiently say that she is, without being too prideful about it, skillful and, as her professors have said, first-rate artistically inclined.

and she believes it too because she has been playing with easels and acrylics since she was a mere child.

but with the musical side of hers that she has kept, rather, low-key private, she’s not confident at it. sure, she plays around with instruments at periods of time. and maybe she gets frustrated when she presses the wrong key while playing the piano. and maybe she gets often sad when the lyrics doesn’t match the tune. and maybe, she gets (more than often) stressed out when she can’t perceive what she feels in a song and resorts to painting it aggressively.

she still believes, up til this day, that she’s nowhere near the level of good in terms of music.

so, that’s why it comes as a to her shock when jennie asks her to audition for the band.

it was just one time that the chaebol has heard her sing, yet, she has this persistent assertiveness that makes her believe that she can nail the auditions and be a vocalist for a semi-official-and-might-perform-for-only-one-night-school-band.

and of course, chaeyoung laughs about it, finding it hilarious that jennie is confident about her that much, when she does not, even remotely, feel it herself.

but seeing that determined look on jennie’s face, she gave in with a shrug of might-as-well-get-over-it and warned jennie that she might flunk it and disappoint her.

in which jennie just flakes it off with a disbelieved scoff and proceeds to take off her shorts. again.

(she mostly prepares for the disappointment that she’ll feel herself, that’s ten times bigger than what will jennie feel, when she fails.)

((and she can’t say no to jennie when she’s giving her this look.))

(((also, she should probably just stop wearing shorts since jennie always removes them.)))

so, when lisa catches her in the music room, she vents all the feelings out to her best friend who keeps looking at her weirdly.

“what?” chaeyoung pauses mid rant when she sees the thai dancer doing that thing with her face.

“what do you mean ‘what’?” lisa composes herself and looks at her nails.

“you have that look when you want to say something, so spill it out.” the blonde crosses her arms.

the thai sighs, “well, i don’t know how to say it without you being too shocked about it.”

“just say it.”

“i think you’re frustrated that your buddy asked you to do an audition and you’re more frustrated that you can’t say no.”

“that’s not-“

“i’m not finished,” lisa holds up a hand, “look, i’ve never seen you this worked up about an audition. i mean, you didn’t even bat an eye when i urged you to join the dance troupe.”

“dancing and singing is different.” chaeyoung places her head on the top of the piano.

“it’s not that much, you perform in front of people and you just, wing it, i think.” the dancer places an arm over her shoulder, “look, whatever happens, i know you’ll do great in it. you’re my best friend for a reason!”

“you’re saying that we’ll finish the friendship that we built for over three years, right this moment, if i’m not talented?” the blonde takes a peek at lisa.

“in a heartbeat,” lisa jokes as she taps her heart twice, then hums, “so, you haven’t mentioned your bed buddy’s name.”

“stop calling her ‘bed buddy’, pabo.” chaeyoung lightly slaps lisa’s leg.

“what am i supposed to call her when you don’t even mention a name? fuck buddy?”

“why are you so crude?!” chaeyoung groans as lisa laughs out loud.

“just tell me the name, chaengie.”

“no,”

“why?” lisa whines.

“because i know you and our other friends are gonna be annoying about it.”

“i can’t believe you just called our friends annoying!” lisa fake gasps, “what would our unnies say? especially seulgi unnie?”

“by annoying, i only meant you.” chaeyoung laughs while lisa pouts.

“is it bad that we’re excited that you have someone you’re interested in?” lisa inquires while pressing a random key.

“yes,” the blonde answers directly, “and i’m not ‘interested’ interested.”

the thai only gives her a look of disbelief.

chaeyoung continues, “and knowing you are gonna be all protective on me, and seulgi unnie and wendy unnie will be the good but intimidating cops on her.”

“oh,” lisa teasingly raises her eyebrows, “so you are interested.”

“i’m craving pho, let’s go, my treat.” chaeyoung gathers her music sheets, leaving her open for lisa to tease her endlessly.

it’s not that she doesn’t want to talk about the thing with her and jennie.

it’s not.

but, she knows how it might get confusing for others when she explains their arrangement, and then she might get confused herself, and she honestly wants to avoid all of that.

to put it simply, she just wants someone to help her release the few frustrations of  _ the _ life, and jennie just happens to be also looking for that.

they’re just two gal pals helping each other out.

nothing more, nothing less.

right?

—————————

someone should give jennie an award or a commemoration for her greatness because park chaeyoung just totally nailed her auditions.

though she has to share the spotlight with the third year communications major, park sooyoung, or better known as, joy.

(apparently, one of yeri and joohyun’s closest friend that recently transferred to the campus.)

but, it’s all good.

knowing joy is there means that chaeyoung won’t have to deal with the pressure all by herself. also the fact that the tall noirette is unsurprisingly friendly, she can tell by the blonde’s relaxed posture during the rehearsals that she’s not yet running to the backstage as soon as the music starts.

it also helps that the band is composed of just girls; jinsol, a second year bio major, behind the keyboard; doyeon, a first year film major, handling the bass; and yves, a second year journalism major, on the drums.

(all the credits go to joohyun and jihyo’s impeccable tastes.)

((but they had to somehow quell the complaints of some men, so they begrudgingly allowed a time limited shirtless basketball shooting contest, and as predicated, the boys are happy.))

all in all, the band is chaotic, but in a good way.

with yves and jinsol’s group of friends stopping by a few times to watch the rehearsals, causing two or more moments where the bio major’s best friend, kim lip, has screeched suddenly and the drummer’s girlfriend, chuu, laughing way too loudly, in return messed up the practices a couple of times because yves can’t keep that loud ass mouth to herself.

also, it doesn’t help with the fact that the first year representative, somi, a performing arts major, is the ex of the bassist, kim doyeon. 

so, when there are moments that jihyo has asked somi to do an errand and to stop by the room where the band are rehearsing for a quick signature, either joohyun’s or jennie’s, the need for a buffer is constant for the rapid tension being made in the room.

(when doyeon’s friends aren’t there, the exes pretend that they don’t exist to each other.)

enter kim yerim and park sooyoung who has the knack to either make the room chaotic or extra chaotic.

ever since joy transferred, yeri has been extra evil, in a lack of better term.

the fact that the duo are constantly concocting pranks on either seulgi or joohyun, and with wendy always tolerating her two energetic friends, the five of them together in a enclosed space is a recipe for mayhem.

(may also add jisoo and lisa sharing one braincell.)

like yeri gifting seulgi a phone case with her fart imprint as the main attraction.

or joy feeding joohyun oreo filled with toothpaste.

just little things that makes seulgi look absolutely confused and joohyun having analmost-permanent scowl in her face.

jennie can say that every rehearsal is a mess.

but, it honestly helps calming chaeyoung’s nerves on stage, so she’ll take what she can get.

she also met lisa, the third year dance major and best friend of her fwb-

(she settles at that in her head.)

and finds out that she quickly bonded with all of her friends, especially, jisoo.

sometimes, the loud cheers of lisa and jisoo’s “that’s okay!” and “park chaeyoung marry me!” (respectively) helps when the blonde accidentally strums the wrong chord on her electric guitar.

so, yes, having a sprinkle, or humps of chaos in the room helps, and distracts, all of them more often than not.

and honestly, jennie likes seeing chaeyoung smile.

she likes it a lot.

—————————

in a span of almost three weeks, jennie starts to notice things that she sometimes didn’t notice at first, and are just noticing now.

it starts with the big things.

like the type where it’s supposed to be universally known but not  _ too known _ by an unsuspecting eye.

the type where jeongyeon calls nayeon ‘of course, stupid’ when the buck toothed girl points out that the girl might get killed in that suspense movie with the plants and dancing in the garden shit.

it starts where she can easily answer basic questions about park chaeyoung.

for example, she absolutely loves mangoes. jennie can verify that fact when she saw chaeyoung eat a whole kilo of mango in one seating while watching atypical.

and in comparison for her love for mangoes, comes with her abhorrent and revolt against avocados. even if she has a very cute plushie of an avocado in her room, she still detests the way it tastes.

chaeyoung also shares the love of strawberry and milk ice cream with jennie, which is both a blessing and a curse. 

(the blessing: jennie has no complaints when chaeyoung’s tongue tastes like her favorite ice cream flavor.

the curse: chaeyoung eats her ice cream way too fast that she also ends up eating jennie’s share because she’s a fucking sucker for the blonde’s pout.)

jennie knows that chaeyoung’s favorite color varies through time. like, she recalls lisa saying that last year, her favorite color was baby pink. and this year, as the blonde casually mentioned during breakfast that her new favorite is sky blue.

(coincidentally, her favorite color also pars the color of her lace undergarments.)

((jennie feels like she really hit the gold.))

she knows that the blonde can do a voice impression of someone stuck in the box.

(when chaeyoung did it for the first time, jennie can’t help but kiss her while laughing against her lips at how ridiculous she sounds.) 

jennie also knows that chaeyoung has a big love for animals, but she won’t dare touch a single cell on bugs and insects, but rather, she’ll just send her love to them. 

it can also be seen by the fact that when chaeyoung comes over, the first that she’ll greet is her dog, kuma, instead of her. and that she’ll spend half an hour with the dog right before she finally sees jennie.

(not that jennie is jealous of kuma, but, it’s sorta questionable since she knows for the fact that she’s a whole lot cuter than kuma.)

(( _this is so pathetic, what the fuck_.))

jennie knows that chaeyoung was born and raised in melbourne, and moved to korea at sixteen, and stayed with her sister, who currently is a lawyer, while her parents stayed at australia handling their business. she actually has met her family over skype and she can admit with a small voice that chaeyoung’s older sister, alice, intimidates her in ways that joohyun unnie could never. but, she knows that chaeyoung’s parents are total sweethearts and very doting on their daughters. she knows that chaeyoung loves her family immensely, as if the huge smile and her overly excited voice when telling stories does not give the sign.

she also knows that chaeyoung has an odd fish in her apartment named joohwangie. and the fact that the blonde pets her fish just by placing her whole hand in the tank, kisses her fish using her finger, and coos at her fish every morning, sometimes, alarms jennie in ways she cannot explain.

but she can’t say that she doesn’t adore chaeyoung’s baby voice when talking to joohwangie or kuma, for the matter.

she also knows that chaeyoung is a big nerd for old music. 

(honestly, who listens to The Carpenters at this time?) 

chaeyoung also happens to own a variety of old vinyl discs and a retro turntable that she got for a cheap price at some garage sale. 

there are times when chaeyoung just suddenly busts out to Four Tops’s Baby I Need Your Loving, and truth to be told, she just can’t help but watch the music dork dance to the rhythm of the song. sometimes, she dances with her, other times, she just stares and revels the sight of her smiling and singing to Stevie Wonder and Aretha Franklin. 

how the heck did jennie find an old soul music junkie? she’ll never know.

and then, there’s the small things.

stuff that you only notice when you accompany a person very often.

chaeyoung likes her pancakes toasted on the edges, with one spoon of syrup and two spoons of melted butter. she likes her coffee black, surprisingly, but with three heaps of sugar, unsurprisingly. she also prefers toasted bread with any kind of jam instead of croissants. though, she has cravings of the latter from time to time.

she also notices that chaeyoung actually likes waking up early, not when she’s being forced to. she showers her plants every morning and says ten kind things to them every day, whether it happened yesterday or three years ago. 

she prefers blue pen over black pen. she always asks for an extra helping of cheese on nachos. she says please every time she’s on the vending machine picking out her drink because ‘it’ might have feelings too. she doesn’t like using straws very much because they take too long to get to her mouth. she eats her food in an alternative manner; for example, she eats the rice first, then the first viand, then rice, then second viand, then rice. she takes too long to order a cheesecake, but always apologizes to the waiter/waitress though they don’t seem to mind.

she tears up over flowers that get trampled on the park. she sings every time they watch the movie, tangled. she gets a little bit of upset when she catches jennie not fixing the bed sheet after waking up, though it can be solved by shower sex, so that’s okay. she does this little wiggle when she takes a bite off a fishcake. oh, and she doesn’t mind pineapples on pizza.

(the horror.)

and the stuff that jennie recently notices. 

like, there are times when chaeyoung just barges in her loft because going all the way to her apartment is too tiring. and jennie doesn’t mind because, a pretty girl staying over at your place for cuddles is a good thing. and the fact that she’s not alone in the big loft anymore.

and that one time during rehearsal where chaeyoung showed up wearing her clothes, and maybe it just made her heart skip a beat, right before yves laughed way too loud again and resulted in a surprised doyeon and jinsol and another round of chaos from lisa, jisoo, yeri and joy.

and that chaeyoung unabashedly admitted to jennie after their nightly activities that she likes wearing her sweaters and hoodies because they smell like chanel and cinnamon and  _ her. _

and that chaeyoung has this ability that makes her cute to sexy, and vice versa, after a few moments, and it drives jennie crazily turned on.

and then, there are the things that jennie feels like she’s the only one who knows.

like, chaeyoung likes bumping their shoulders lightly when walking. or when she brushes her pinky finger with jennie’s until they’re connected. or when she gives her this cuter-than-jennie’s eye smile when she sees an adorable animal pass by them.

and the way she likes her hair to be tugged during make outs. admires the little hickeys that jennie puts in unnoticeable places, even if she denies it. her toned legs tremble around her waist thrice before she crashes into euphoria. and her lips always find hers, moving so languidly that jennie can almost hear her soul sing in contentment. 

and the fact that chaeyoung always steals a glance at jennie when she thinks she’s not looking.

but jennie always notices.

and she always lets her get away with it.

(not without a smile that easily slips out of her lips.)

the small things and big things, the irrelevant and the relevant, the simple and the complicated. these things that jennie unknowingly starts to memorize, starts to appreciate by moments, starts to treasure it by heart. 

and it’s really stupidly infuriating that someone has to point out the things that she should’ve already knew but didn’t.

nayeon is infuriating and stupid.

————————

it was the night before the college fair when jennie’s friends suddenly barged inside her house like they own the place and with no warning whatsoever.

with the air of relaxation already gone in the atmosphere, jennie accepts the fact that she won’t get any time for herself as long as she doesn’t change the code on her door.

she sees yeri and jisoo by the kitchen, taking out the box of chicken wings and drumsticks, and also the soju bottles. she notices too, that nayeon and jeongyeon are in a middle of organizing the space of the living room for their bodies to fit. 

she resigns to the couch with an expression of this-better-be-worth-it, and deep down, like really really deep down and no way in hell she’ll let her friends know ever, all the moments with them are worth it regardless of the mayhem they brought.

when all is settled, jisoo clears her throat and invites everyone to raise their glasses.

“to a successful and enjoyable college fair tomorrow!”

jennie drowns her drink in one go, and pouring another round of soju afterwards. she listens to her friends ramble about their idiosyncrasies and eccentric moments that recently happened. she laughs at their lame jokes and petty trash talks.

at some point, her mind starts to wander to a certain blonde artist. she thinks of what chaeyoung must be feeling right now. is she nervous? excited? thrilled? skittish? is she making another charcoal art on her sketchpad? is she eating cereals at this evening so she can sleep easily at night? is she listening to harry styles’s voice on her turntable? 

she is aware that the third year art student has been on her mind lately, especially ever since they both started sleeping in each others’ places. she knows.

she isn’t stupid.

but she is surely stupid enough for being surprised when yeri suddenly shouts in her ear.

“yah! what was that?!” jennie rubs her ear while glaring at her laughing friends.

“we’ve been trying to get your attention, jendeuk.” jisoo shrugs, “not our fault you’re distracted.”

“ohhhh,” yeri bumps her shoulder with jennie, “tell us who.”

“it’s not a who,” jennie easily lies, not meeting nayeon’s knowing stare, “just worried about the performance tomorrow.”

“are you afraid that they might screw it up?” jeongyeon asks.

jennie shakes her head, “not at all, but it’s their first time performing with an actual live audience.”

“i have faith in them,” yeri eats a piece of chicken. “i mean, have you heard them sing?”

“to be honest, i didn’t know that she has that voice in her.” jisoo admits. “i mean, i expected from joy because she transferred from the school of performing arts, but, chaeyoungie?”

“chaeyoungie?” jennie confusedly asks. 

“we really bonded, jen,” jisoo sighs dreamily, “do you think she’s single?”

“w-what?” jennie sputters out.

“sorry, unnie,” yeri quips, “joy unnie already has her sights on her.”

jennie snaps her sight to the youngest, “what do you mean?”

“oh, i meant in the way that you’re thinking right now.” yeri confirms jennie’s suspicions.

“that kinda makes me sad,” jisoo pouts then drinks it off. “oh well, you think she’ll say yes?”

yeri shrugs, then pours another soju on her glass.

“i think, no.” nayeon interferes.

“and why is that?” jeongyeon questions.

nayeon only smirks, “i just have that feeling.”

“you know something,” yeri narrows her eyes, “spill, unnie.”

“nope, sorry.” the bunny teeth owner grins.

“yah, that’s not fair!”

“you’re such a stingy ass!”

“not my fault you’re all brainless!”

“what did you say?!”

meanwhile, jennie heads towards the kitchen amidst the chaos in the living room. with a sinking feeling in her stomach, she begins to feel confused and quickly opens the fridge for a water. she rewinds the moments in her mind where she thought that joy was being friendly, when in fact, it confirmed her suspicions that the actions have an underlying agenda.

joy’s hand on chaeyoung’s waist when they read the musical notes since they both play electric guitar. 

joy’s stare lingering a second longer when chaeyoung laughs at their bandmates’ antics. 

joy giving chaeyoung a soft look when the blonde pouts when she gets confused at the basic bass chords that doyeon teaches her.

it’s not that jennie has anything against joy, but something about her and chaeyoung doesn’t sit right.

with her mind in a rubble with joy and chaeyoung, she fails, once again, to notice nayeon leaning against the table beside her. she doesn’t even notice that she’s gripping her mug with a much more force.

“penny for your thoughts?” nayeon taps her friend’s shoulder.

jennie jolts at the sudden touch, “what?”

“you were glaring at your sink like it ruined your favorite chanel dress.” nayeon points out, “mind telling me why?”

“no, it’s nothing, really.”

“i literally smell the bullshit in your mouth.”

“your mouth is closer to your nose, so maybe, it’s your own shit.”

“just tell me,” nayeon rolls her eyes, “maybe i can help.”

jennie bites her lip, contemplating whether to tell her best friend or not. it’s not that she doesn’t trust nayeon, it’s just that she’s not the type to open up about any type of discomfort or problem to anybody without figuring it out first on her own. and if she can’t really handle it, then she’ll ask for help.

but seeing the look on nayeon’s face gives her a sense of vulnerability. like she can drop the tough persona, and be herself for a little while.

“what yeri said,” jennie pauses, “it bothers me and, i don’t know why.”

nayeon only hums, already expecting jennie’s predicament. the bunny engineer knows her best friend long enough that she’s not yet used to those kinds of feelings, or the fact that she hasn’t even acknowledged that she’s capable of having them.

and mind you, jennie has never expressed any interest towards anybody in a way she does with, well, chaeyoung.

“which part?” nayeon wants jennie to say it.

jennie fiddles with a stray thread on her shirt, “the part where joy has her eyes on chaeyoung.”

“why would you even be bothered by that?” nayeon starts to lay the groundworks.

“because,” jennie frustratedly answers, “it’s chaeyoung.”

“yeah, and?” nayeon silently urges jennie to just  see the reason for herself.

“and it bothers me that joy likes chaeyoung.” the chaebol spits out, and nayeon almost celebrates in her head.

“so, you’re,” nayeon pauses, “jealous?”

“no!” jennie says with an annoyed look on her face. “i’m not jealous.”

“then why are you being worked up over it?”

“because i like chae-“

jennie stops.

—————

oh my god.

she likes chaeyoung.

—————

with a proud smile on nayeon’s lips, she pats jennie’s catatonic frame before going back to the chaotic trio, “maybe you should start making a move, mandu.”

—————

later that night, jennie lies awake as jisoo snores loudly in her ear, drunken out of her mind. nayeon and yeri are asleep in the guest room, while jeongyeon has taken the couch.

she scrambles the how’s and the why’s of park chaeyoung inside her mind. desperate for any answers, she stands up and opens the lamp in her work desk while she sits on the chair. she grabs a pen and a piece of paper, and draws two columns with the title,  _ liking park chaeyoung: how | why . _

_ how: _

jennie huffs in exasperation when she can’t think of anything, so she does the other part.

_ why: _

  * her eyes are pretty
  * her smile is beautiful
  * she sings wonderfully
  * she cooks delicious food
  * when she laughs, everything turns brighter and colorful
  * she smells like apples
  * she’s a great kisser
  * like very great
  * she sings baby songs to kuma when he gets restless
  * she wears her heart on her sleeves
  * she asks permission to squeeze my cheeks
  * she’s really beautiful



jennie stops and stares at her list.

it’s so fucking _sappy._

after she crumples it and throws it in the garbage bin, she slides beside jisoo, and continues to stare at the ceiling. her mind still preoccupied of a certain blonde who will be singing tomorrow and will probably be horrified once she finds out that jennie likes her.

oh god, jennie _likes_ chaeyoung.

she silently groans.

the fact that her liking chaeyoung, genuinely and romantically, while they silently agreed that feelings should definitely not be involved and are in it for the fuck and possibly, friendship, does not look good on her. at all.

what would chaeyoung even think of her?

she reminds herself to talk to nayeon tomorrow and to ask how to stop it before it gets out of hand. 

jennie decides that she needs to get a hold of herself. she likes chaeyoung enough that she even had imagined them being friends in the long run.

not, them as girlfriends.

although, having the chance to hold chaeyoung’s hand without reason is nice to think about. and giving her flowers. and picking her up for their dates. and kissing her just because. and-

jennie stops the thoughts.

what the hell is she gonna do now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> insert *what the hell are we gonna do now?* meme :c rip, queen
> 
> originally, the whole chapter 6 is long asf and it really stressed me out in levels you cannot even understand bc of the editing and proof reading and removing unnecessary scenes, AND hence, i decided to cut it in half to lessen the workload.
> 
> also, pretty sure my body clock is fucked up bc i constantly sleep at 6/7am and wake up at 1/2pm and i miss the times where i get sleepy at 10pm T_T
> 
> so last chapter, i said chaos, and this is just like a framework of chaos, i guess?
> 
> i’m just building things up hahahahha
> 
> there’s a scene that i removed in the first chapter where yeri bails from the club due to picking up joy with irene and the gang and T_T kinda wished i didn’t removed that lol
> 
> anyway, leave your comments or protests below!! constructive criticism is accepted as long as it makes sense <3
> 
> \+ twiceblackvelvetloona stans we eating good this month <3
> 
> oh my god this is so long im so sorry


	7. the liabilities of hoping

when the morning came, jennie is one of the earliest birds by the campus, along with the student council members and the representatives per department running around to check and fix for any last minute mishaps.

with the newfound thought regarding park chaeyoung at the back of her mind, jennie focuses on her task of delegating of where the needed materials will be placed.

with her phone on her hand, and a folder in the other, she briskly walks to the student council room along with the few college boys volunteering to carry the speakers that will be used later.

of course, when she opens the room, she expects that it’ll be filled with increased levels of stress, and as always, she was right.

she sees a few volunteers with their heads bowed as the president reprimands them for almost breaking the materials, haseul typing out emails furiously for the lights and sound equipments that they rented, seokjin filing the reports, namjoon and sehun helping out jihyo with paperworks.

jennie tells the volunteers to place the speakers by the corner of the room, and sits beside joohyun who was now sporting an intimidating look as one of the volunteers explained what happened.

“it’s only nine and a lot of stuff has already happened.” jennie leans back on the chair and sighs.

joohyun raises her hand, and the volunteer stops talking immediately, “make sure this doesn’t happen again or you will pay for the damages.”

the volunteer barely manages to squeak out a ‘yes, pres!’ right before walking away with his other friends with their heads down.

“i just really want this to be over,” the president releases a deep breathe, “do you mind telling jisoo to bring four cups of coffee for those five?” she points to jihyo, seokjin, namjoon, sehun and haseul.

“sure,” jennie types in her phone, “anything you want?”

“no, seungwan will drop by to bring breakfast.” joohyun also leans back on the chair.

“must be nice to have a girlfriend that cooks for you.” jennie muses enough that she can see someone in her mind, but she pushes the thought away quickly.

“you should’ve gotten yourself one, then.” joohyun turns to her, “you know, you should make your move.”

“my what now?” jennie stiffens, eyes wide.

“it’s not rocket science, jen,” joohyun rolls her eyes, “don’t worry, i didn’t tell anybody.”

“about what?” jennie gulps, heart hammering against her chest.

“you really want me to say it out loud?”

“i have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“you and chae-“

“alright, stop!” jennie covers the president’s mouth.

joohyun pushes the hand away, “joy likes her, you know?”

“so, i’ve been told,” jennie mutters.

“i know it should be none of my concern, but you both are my friends, and i’m wary it might get complicated.”

“i don’t-“ jennie pauses, collecting her thoughts, “i’m trying not to like her.”

“why is that?” the senior looks at her confusingly.

jennie doesn’t answer.

“well, whatever it is, figure it out quickly before joy beats you to it.”

really great morning indeed.

————————

jennie spends the day walking around the campus with either joohyun or jihyo, sometimes, it’s namjoon when she goes out to meet with the stage crew, but either way, she was a busy bee all day.

it was nearing two, and she still hasn’t eaten any proper breakfast, and the fact that she’s also sweating a lot due to the blazing heat of the sun. her shirt stuck to her skin uncomfortably, yet she still pushes herself to finish her tasks before she goes crazy and leave everything to her friends.

half an hour later, she was just returning to the student council room when joohyun suddenly called.

“unnie?” jennie slows her walk as she answered the senior.

“jen, are you near the practice room?”

“uh,” jennie looks around and sees that she’s just a couple steps away from the band’s practice room. “yeah, why?”

“that’s great,” she hears joohyun sigh in relief, “can you tell joy and yeri to come over here right now? i’ve been trying to reach them, but i can’t. their phones must be on silent.”

jennie hesitates, not exactly ready what to do or say after her new revelation, but it’s joohyun unnie, so she relents. “sure, i’ll drop by.”

“thanks, enjoy your break!”

jennie sighs, contemplating what she should do, but in the last second, she shrugs it off and reminds herself to act normal.

as she opens the door to the practice room, she can certainly hear the bickering of yeri and yves.

jennie falters a step when she sees chaeyoung with a guitar on her lap as she smiles widely at the antics of the bickering duo. her heart trips over when the blonde’s eyes squints adorably when she laughs out loud when joy suddenly joined the bickering.

her breath got stuck in her throat when chaeyoung suddenly looks at her direction, and if it’s even possible, her eyes shined brighter. 

“unnie!” yeri waves, “what’s up?”

jennie swiftly moves in front of the band, “joohyun unnie was asking for joy and you.”

“really?” joy scrambles at her bag and grabs her phone. “yah! yerim!”

yeri curses under her breathe as she sees her phone flooded with calls and messages. “i totally forgot about her surprise with seungwan unnie.”

“we’re so screwed,” joy groans as she stands up, “let’s go before unnie actually marches down here to choke us.”

“i’m blaming this on you,” yeri says as she hurriedly takes her stuff.

“yah!” joy shouts to her shorter friend running towards the door, then faces the amused reaction of her bandmates. “practice again in two hours, okay? i gotta go.”

as joy runs out of the room, jennie still hasn’t taken her eyes off of chaeyoung, who was now looking at her with also an amused stare.

“what?” jennie can’t help but ask.

“have you eaten yet?” chaeyoung asks, her face all light and almost angelic.

“i was about to-“

“great, let’s have lunch.” the blonde ties her hair in a low ponytail.

lunch with chaeyoung used to be relaxing, at most. with their constant light teases to sharing silly stories of their teenage drama, it was never a dull moment with the blonde.

but after jennie’s new found knowledge, her nerves had reached her before she can even stop them. and it frustrates her to no end that she can’t utter out single coherent thought without second guessing everything she says now that she’s aware of her silly (serious) crush on chaeyoung.

“you seem quiet,” chaeyoung notes, chin on her knuckle as it rests on the table. “you okay?”

“yeah,” jennie evades the blonde’s stare, “just stressed about the whole fair. i want it to be over.”

“don’t worry about it,” chaeyoung says, “you guys have been working hard these days and i’m sure it’ll all work out.”

jennie nods, then remembers a tiny detail that lisa told her a few days ago. “i’m sorry that you had to skip practice for the dance later.”

“ah, don’t be sorry!” the blonde shakes her head and her hands, “lisa will help me out with the practice after she mastered it. she’s great like that.”

jennie meets chaeyoung’s gaze full of assurance, a smile painted on her pink lips as she stares at the older girl.

of course, jennie’s gaze drops on her lips.

if she could kiss here at this moment-

_ no, stop _ . she grips her bag under the table as she switches to another safer topic. her mind still on the run of the possibility if she ever did that on a whim.

will chaeyoung look at her differently?

will she act the same or not?

will she change?

(who is she kidding, of course she will.)

jennie scoffs in her head, all while nodding at everything chaeyoung says.

————————

while jennie is in her inner turmoil, chaeyoung doesn’t fail to notice that the older girl is obviously distracted.

and as much as it saddens her that jennie couldn’t tell her what’s bothering her, she respects it. she waits for jennie because even with their weird arrangement, she considers them as friends, and close ones, dare say.

chaeyoung’s always been like that. always wanting to lend a helping hand no matter the reason. kindness is what she knew growing up, and it’d be a fail on her part if she doesn’t help lighten jennie’s load at some way.

she wishes this is one of those moments where she could read jennie’s mind and help her out.

that’s what friends do, right?

————————

“you have a practice in an hour, rosie,” jennie warily says as she lets herself be pulled by the ever so charming blonde after they had lunch. “where are you even taking me?”

“you’re such a worrywart, jen,” chaeyoung softly laughs, “we’re almost there.”

the both of them steadily make their way up to the biology building’s rooftop. jennie’s gaze lands on the set of keys that chaeyoung has on her fingers, twirling it around like it’s perfectly normal for an art student to have a key to the biology department’s rooftop.

“so, two years ago, i was a struggling freshie who was way too overwhelmed by everything around me. i think it was a week before the finals, and i was freaking out at the library because i took an elective related to biology.” chaeyoung starts to explain as they climb the stairs.

“i really thought botany would be fun to learn,” jennie sees the blonde scoff at the memory, “it’s fun but it’s really hard. i spent a week crying over the scientific names of the whole family of tulips.”

when they stop in front of a red door, chaeyoung turns to jennie with a twinkle in her eye. “so, i come here whenever i need to catch a breathe and just take a break.”

as soon as chaeyoung opens the door, a camaraderie of colors greet her sight. ranging from fresh green to purple lilacs, from royal blues to baby pinks, and the sound of birds chirping can be heard throughout the area. she steps in the greenhouse, fully taking in the sight of the gifts of earth.

she feels her heart race when her gaze lands on chaeyoung snipping a single stem of a white flower with a black center.

“this is _Papaver somniferum L_.” the blonde laughs at jennie’s confused expression. “common name is white poppies.” 

“even though studying botany for half a year earned me a truckload of headaches, it still made me appreciate the little things in life. that’s why i tear up too when someone steps on the plants.”

she approaches jennie with a flower in her hand, “white poppies are a symbol of peace, usually worn on a remembrance day or somewhat.”

when chaeyoung hands her the flower, her brows knot in confusion, “why are you giving me this?”

“you looked like you had a lot in my mind,” chaeyoung pauses, “i know we had an unordinary start in our friendship, but i hope you know that you can lean on me whenever you need to.”

jennie’s heart starts to throb, “i-i don’t know what to say.”

“you can accept this flower for once,” the blonde teases, “don’t worry about it, i come here once in a while to babysit them when others can’t.”

she takes the flower in chaeyoung’s hand, careful not to touch her skin. “thank you, it means a lot.”

“so, what’s on your mind?”

jennie looks up and sees chaeyoung filling the can with water. she spots a chair near the small bonsai and takes a seat, content with just watching the blonde in her element as she showers them with water.

“a lot,” she finally says after a few moments. “how’d you get the keys to this place?”

if chaeyoung senses that she shifted the topic on purpose, she doesn’t mention anything about it.

“well, i was friends with taeyeon unnie during her undergrad years, and she caught me one time having a meltdown in front of this big book in the library.” chaeyoung sets down the watering can on a table. “she brought me here to calm down, and ever since then, i’ve been going here when things get crazy.”

jennie nods, still staring at the delicate flower that she held.

“i hope this place helps you calm your thoughts too,”

at that, she stares right into the blonde’s eyes as she stands right across from her with a gentle smile on her lips.

the irony of chaeyoung’s words.

how can she even reach the state of calmness when her heart flutters at the sound of chaeyoung’s voice? or the way her porcelain skin shine against the sunlight? or when her hair compliments her skin so well she almost resembles an angel?

or when she looks at jennie like  _ that _ ?

that stupid soft twinkle in her eyes that only appears when she’s with her?

that dumb urge to let all her walls down and just be completely herself around chaeyoung?

_all of this just to help me calm down_? , she huffs.

“you are a paradox, park chaeyoung.” jennie finally says, right before she stands up in front of the blonde and kisses her.

———————

chaeyoung has been kissed before.

she first handedly knew that kissing is simply just a pair of lips touching the other. and of course, she learned from the romance books that they all have this fireworks or sparks or fire growing inside of the characters when they finally kiss.

and in twenty one years of her existence, she had never came close to that.

she still hasn’t.

and kissing jennie never gave her any sort of feelings that she can relate to a literature.

kissing jennie was nice. great even. way too great.

like the perfect kissing partner.

jennie knows what she likes, the buttons to push, the places to touch, the intensity of the grips she wanted.

in short, jennie is the miracle that she wanted.

the perfect-no-feelings-attached-only-friendship kind of bed buddy.

but this?

kissing jennie right now in the greenhouse?

it sort of felt surreal.

like the type where confusion mixed fascination and glee and a hint of _something_ she can’t pinpoint.

kissing jennie is nice. great even. way too great.

but, god, as selfish as it seems, she wants to keep this feeling forever.

kissing jennie has never felt this good.

and never this confusing.

————————

as soon as jennie pulls back, she senses chaeyoung trying to catch it again, even with her eyes closed. her heart thrumming not-steadily against her chest, she’s afraid that the blonde might heart it.

she opens her eyes, and the feeling of hope blooms inside of her.

jennie catches the dazed look in chaeyoung’s, she sees that twinkle again, and in all graciousness, never had she looked so beautiful right at this moment.

with her hand still cupping her face, and the other on her neck, she’s vaguely aware of the blonde’s tightening grip on her waist.

she nears chaeyoung again, and the blonde naturally closes her eyes, already anticipating another kiss that’ll leave both of them in a state of glee.

(the other one knows why, the other doesn’t).

instead jennie whispers, her breathe softly hitting the blonde’s. “i’d kiss you again, but you’re already late to your practice.”

at that, a flash of panic shoots through chaeyoung’s brown eyes.

jennie steps back and watches as the blonde fetches her belongings and the keys. she stays mum, smile still on present as she hears chaeyoung grumble about how she’s at fault for being distracting and she’ll blame it on her if she ever gets scolded and-

(chaeyoung stops mid rant when jennie grabs her hand as they briskly walk to the practice room.)

((blushes and park chaeyoung are definitely a part of jennie’s top ten favorite.))

———————

after dropping off chaeyoung at the practice room, jennie can’t help but smile giddily at the fact that maybe liking chaeyoung isn’t bad at all.

she’s eighty percent sure that the blonde likes her back, but isn’t aware of it yet.

no matter, jennie can surely help chaeyoung with that.

at the thought, a surge of endorphins rush through her as she runs to the student council’s room to finish her job quickly so she can buy chaeyoung a flower.

hopefully, the right one that will send the message.

————————

thirty minutes until the start of the show.

jennie taps her fingers impatiently on the table as she waits in the food station. apparently, one of the students ran out to buy more ingredients and left alone chaeryoung, a first year literature major, manning the station. and though, for the first few minutes, she’s handling it well, jennie notices from afar that someone has been sneakily stealing extra bobas from the back. and the poor chaeryoung notices a little later and is close to tears, so she offers a helping hand after finishing her task.

what she didn’t know is that it’ll take a whole hour to buy some damn ingredients.

“chaeryoung-ssi, where is your friend?” jennie tries to keep the impatience out from her tone.

the brunette scrambles a reply, “h-he’s running back from the store, unnie. he said he got stuck in the traffic.”

jennie curses in her head. the flower shop is at least seven blocks away, and with the amount of cars parked in and out of the campus, plus the traffic of the evening rush, it might be a stretch to even buy flowers at this time.

she figures to borrow yeri’s bike, but she’s not as fit as the younger one and will probably pass out half through the ride.

and as much as she’d like to go up the greenhouse and pick a flower for rosie, she’d rather not.

if it means giving her all to show that she genuinely likes chaeyoung, she’ll have to take a risk and jump head first.

after all, maybe chaeyoung is worth the risk.

~

bestest friend ever: jendeuk wru ??

jendeukie: stuck at traffic. did it start already?

bestest friend ever: not yet :P

bestest friend ever: lisa is asking whats taking u so long

jendeukie: why??

bestest friend ever: i think chaeng is looking 4 u  👀

bestest friend ever: when did u n her get close???

jendeukie: almost there, 5 more mins

—————————

rosie  🤍 : so do you have any favorite songs atm?

grumpy cat:paramore

rosie  🤍 : anything more specific than that?

grumpy cat: can’t think of any

rosie  🤍 : ok  😝

rosie  🤍 : dinner later after the show?

grumpy cat: no after party for rosie???

rosie  🤍 : too tired ://

grumpy cat: but not too tired for sex right?

rosie  🤍 : yahhh!!!!!! why are you so!!!!???!!!  😡

grumpy car: that’s a no?

rosie  🤍 : shut up.

rosie  🤍 : hurry back  🥺

grumpy cat: omw  🏃🏻‍♀️

—————————

“tell me it hasn’t started yet,” jennie catches her breathe as she stands besides jisoo. she clutches the carnation in her hand tightly, looking around for any sign of blonde hair and a charming smile.

“nope,” jisoo stares at her best friend weirdly, also taking note of the flower in her hand. “you should’ve seen the dance troupe, they literally made everyone shout and holler in amazement.”

“oh, that’s great, really great.” jennie only half listens, still focused on searching for the familiar blonde.

“yeah, they even made me shout too. like who would’ve thought the japanese line would pull that off. and lisa too! that pabo may act like a goof but she has moves.” jisoo continues to rant, but senses that the younger one isn’t listening.

“if you’re looking for chaeyoung, she’s in the backstage with others.”

“what?” jennie snaps her head towards jisoo’s knowing glance. “i wasn’t-“

“yah, jendeuk, did you think i’m blind?” jisoo crosses her arms.

“sorry,” jennie sighs and resigns at the fact that maybe she isn’t subtle like she thought she was. “it’s just new to me, that’s all.”

jisoo stares at her best friend, face filled with a hint of guilt, so she immediately hugs the sweaty chaebol. “it’s okay, you’re my best friend, dummy. but, really, you should’ve told me so i could’ve helped you out.”

“i’ve got it all worked out, but thank you for the offer.” jennie gives the older girl a nervous smile. 

“i expect details later because they’re starting now.” jisoo points at the stage as the MCs announce the last performance of the day.

jennie turns and her eyes immediately lands on a blonde with a black thin sweater tucked in a maroon skirt and her hair pinned by a small black clip, as she adjusts her guitar strap on her shoulder.

it was clear from the sides that chaeyoung looked extremely beautiful, eye-catching even, but none of it helped jennie’s heart to calm.

“she looks a bit nervous, don’t you think?” she hears jisoo, and nods in agreement. the blonde did look nervous, eyes a bit panicky as her back is turned against the audience.

and as much as jennie dislikes joy’s advancements these past few weeks, she’s thankful that she can be there to ease chaeyoung’s nerves.

she sees joy give the blonde an encouraging smile, and say something that makes her laugh. then, her shoulders relax and she faces the crowd.

more cheers can be heard as chaeyoung smiles gratefully, mix of nerves and excitement present in her state.

“hi guys, my name is rosé,” the blonde introduces herself as hoots and cheers erupt more from the audience.

“park sooyoung, but call me joy.” the tall girl gives an infectious smile.

“my name is doyeon!” the bassist winks at the audience.

“yves, and i’m already taken by the name of chuu.” the short haired girl points her drumsticks at her girlfriend in the front row.

“jinsoul and i love animals and my friends!” the keyboarder, albeit, shouts at the mic, earning a praises from her friends and the animal lovers as well.

“and we’re the red eclipse!” they say in unison.

“i hope you guys like our little performance!” joy says, before nodding her head at her members, signing that they’ll be starting any second now.

yves taps her drumsticks thrice, and then it starts.

——————————

jennie was simply captivated.

especially to the blonde girl twirling around the stage with jinsoul.

when joy started with their opening song, everyone started to cheer so loudly that they can barely hear the instruments play. luckily, the staff increased the amps and the sound systems just in time.

everyone was given a chance to sing, and they all did amazingly.

but, jennie has her eyes set on chaeyoung specifically.

every move, every dance, every silly face that she makes when their eyes meet at the crowd, it all makes her feel like she’s on cloud nine.

like her heart can’t stop fluttering every single time chaeyoung locks gazes with her.

it’s so pathetic that she likes her so much.

and now, it on they just finished the last set on the setlist when suddenly chaeyoung announces that she’ll be singing one last song.

jennie glances at joohyun, who shrugs at her in return. already confused, she waits for more details as chaeyoung talks to the rest of the members.

“the previous song was supposed to be the last, but, i wanted to dedicate one last song for a very dear person.” chaeyoung says on the microphone after talking to the girls.

“you know who you are.”

——————————

“ _When I was younger_

_ I saw my daddy cry _

_And curse at the wind_ ”

if jennie’s heart kept fluttering earlier, now it did, but in a frenzy way. like in a medically concerning way, and god, is this what it feels like to have butterflies in your stomach?

with her cheeks flushed, she ignores jisoo and nayeon’s (she arrived when yves was singing) teasing looks and stares at chaeyoung’s lovely self.

it also seems like the blonde senses her stare that she naturally locks gazes with her. the twinkle in her eyes brighter than before and it makes jennie feel a little lightheaded at the fact that it is most certainly for her.

the flower in her hand itches and she just wants to give it to chaeyoung and maybe kiss her and confess to her. like on the stage. with tons of people. in front of her new fans. in front of her.

she laughs at the thought and sees chaeyoung scrunch her nose at her, probably thinking that she thinks of her as corny.

(jennie thinks that she’s beautiful and gorgeous and amazing and ethereal and god-sent and talented and-)

((she likes chaeyoung so much.))

“ _you are the only exception_.”

chaeyoung ends with a charming smile at the crowd and bows with the rest of the band. the mcs immediately steps on the stage and greets the band all while telling them how they hyped up the crowd so much that they’ve just demanded another performance.

meanwhile, jennie briskly walks to the backstage, not waiting for nayeon or jisoo,to give the girl, who dedicated a song for her, a flower.

jennie hopes for the best.

——————————

do you know the feeling of having the thing you always wanted get taken from you even if you’re so close?

the crushing feeling that you’re literally seconds away from having it only for it to be taken out of your reach?

and the fact that you’re witnessing such event and you can’t suddenly know what to feel because you’re in the state of shock?

that’s how jennie feels when she opens the backstage door and sees joy jumping up and down screaming, “she agreed on a date with me!”, while yeri begrudgingly groans against the taller’s excitement, but still happy for her friend.

she spots chaeyoung a couple of steps in the back talking to her friends, her post-performance elation still seen with the way she animatedly talks with her hands.

the flower burns against her palm.

her chest suddenly feels tight.

a stab in the gut hits her, and she looks around and sees jisoo and nayeon behind her, catching their breathes.

the flower burns.

“give it to mina.” jennie’s face devoid of any emotion. “carnation means admiration, tell her that and don’t miss out like me.”

she doesn’t wait anymore for nayeon’s protests, or meets jisoo’s sympathetic eyes. she wants to get out of here. away from joy being painfully happy. away from chaeyoung planting seeds of hope. away from this.

she’s just so angry.

angry at her short legs. angry at the crowd preventing her from getting to the backstage earlier. angry at the guy that she bumped into. angry at joy. angry at chaeyoung.

mostly, angry at herself.

no.

she’s red hot furious at herself.

jennie feels so fucking dumb for even remotely having feelings for chaeyoung. who in the right mind would have feelings for the person they’re having casual sex with?

she feels stupid for even considering that chaeyoung liked her back. and that she’s confident about that.

and then she feels guilty.

because chaeyoung never said anything that would make jennie hope.

that was all on her.

she was projecting her feelings on chaeyoung.

jennie grips the wheel tighter, still angry at herself for hoping just because of a insignificant moment. 

this is all on her.

she ignores her ringing phone and focuses on driving toward her parents’ house. thankfully, it’s the weekend, and it’s been a while since she stayed over at her parents’ place. she misses them a lot, especially her mom.

before jisoo and nayeon, her mom is her best friend.

she talks to her about everything. she loves her mom a lot and that she’s supportive of everything that she does.

and with that, she’s thankful she has a loving family to run to when shit gets real.

and by real, it means having feelings for someone else for the first time.

and getting her hopes up for absolutely no reason.

—————————

“chu, what?” jennie grumbles as she closes the door to her car.

“what do you mean, ‘what’?! are you out of your mind?!” her best friends shouts at the phone. “why would you run off like that?!”

she greets the bodyguards standing by the door before she enters the front door. 

“just because.”

“whatever it is, at least tell reply back to nay that you’re okay. she’s been sweating off while waiting for mina to meet her here at the coffee shop.”

“she’s really going through it?” jennie surprised at her friend’s antics. “i just told her that on a whim. can’t believe she’s going through it.”

“i had to push her to do it, and also jeongyeon. she said bring home food, by the way.”

jennie rolls her eyes, grabbing a change of clothes by her closet. “yeah, i’ll tell her.”

“oh, and chaeyoung’s looking for you.”

jennie grips her phone tight.

“really? what did you say?” she coolly asks even though her heart is pounding.

“i said that you got heartbroken and ran off.”

“YAH! KIM JISOO!” jennie shouts at her phone, the thrumming in her ears now painfully present.

she hears three stupid laughs over the phone, before she gets an answer.

“hey, this is nayeon. don’t worry, jisoo didn’t actually say that.”

“you should’ve heard her voice!” jeongyeon laughs with jisoo.

“don’t worry mandu! i said you went home because of an emergency!” jisoo hurriedly says, still laughing.

“i’m gonna kill you all.” jennie threateningly says.

“you can’t kill me because i might be dead by the time you come back.” nayeon quips.

“why is that?”

“mina might reject me, okay. there’s a possibility.” nayeon replies with a hint of sadness.

“hey, there’s no telling that, alright?” jennie is quick to assure her friend. “and we’ll be by your side if it goes the other way around.”

nayeon clicks her tongue, “with you over there?”

“i can drive really quick, you know.”

“yeah, i know,” nayeon says, sincerity can be heard from her voice. “oh, jeong wants to talk to you.”

“unnie, i’m offended that i’m last to know,” jeongyeon whines on the phone.

“technically, i never told anyone.” jennie corrects, setting her phone on speaker, “but like i said to jisoo earlier, it’s all new to me, so it didn’t crossed my mind to tell you all. sorry for that.”

“it’s fine. so, are you okay?” jeongyeon asks.

“yeah, i’m fine.” jennie doesn’t need to mention that she almost shouted at the stoplight for being slow. “just really exhausted.”

“well, i won’t keep you long. jisoo and i need to go home anyway.”

“what about nayeon?”

“she said she’ll stay in the streets and cry if things go south,” jeongyeon answers.

jennie hears nayeon say something about betting her ass that she will, so she hurriedly says good luck and bids bye to her friends.

after that, with her clothes fully changed, she treks towards her mother’s room and sees her already asleep. she tiptoes carefully and lays beside her, and with that her thoughts were calm once again.

she’ll deal with whatever shit she has to tomorrow. right now, she wants to sleep.

hopefully, her feelings for chaeyoung are close to nonexistent.

feelings suck.

especially when it’s for someone who is so easily likable and kind and nice and sings songs for you and cooks your favorite breakfast and laughs at your dad jokes and watches space documentaries and doesn’t hog the blanket and smiles so prettily that it puts athena to shame and-

this fucking sucks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> writer’s block is such a pain in the ass i swear. and personally, this chapter feels so lacking oh my god but i want this to be done with bc im currently on another fic (the angsty one yeah it’s gonna be a long one shot) anyway WRITER’S BLOCK SUCK MY D!CK
> 
> apologies for any errors or grammatically incorrect sentences or misspelled words :( 
> 
> im so torn between wanting to delete this by afternoon or not lol but god i think this chapter is like “an okay” for me and i really tried to like bring the tiny angst and it’s so hard bc im relaxed and shit and 😭
> 
> it’s yves bday + twice teasers (omg i died at misanayeon’s) + lisoo vlive + park chaeyoung and kim jennie just basically breathing = loving my life
> 
> next chapter is gonna be put up within this week bc i really wanna finish this lolol
> 
> tysm for sticking by and reading this ily stay safe and support sour candy <3
> 
> this is too long again im so sorry :c


	8. the reverberations of each conclusion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> #BlackLivesMatter
> 
> if any of you see links that may help the movement, please do not hesitate and spare a minute to help! big changes starts with small acts of change.
> 
> warning: this chapter is long <3

* * *

after a relaxing weekend with her parents and her dogs, as kuma was brought to her parents’ house courtesy of jisoo in exchange of a week free lunch, it was easy to say that the small incident at the college fair was shrugged off with finesse.

(easy to say, yes.)

she’s kim jennie, for fuck’s sake. she’s not supposed to mope over one girl, albeit incredible and kind and pretty and-

the point is, she’s not gonna stay hung up on one girl for a long time. she’s jennie. with the utter of her name, she knows everyone wishes to have a chance with her or be her. it’s just how it is. 

she can do it.

and she supposes it’s not that hard to get over a stupid crush.

she’ll get over this hindrance and continue with her life. that’s how she is. not dwelling on things that will cause her no good.

she’ll pass this. no biggie.

turns out, it’s a lot harder than jennie thought.

half surprisingly and half not.

it was a week after the college fair, and she was swamped with essays and reports. normally, she has a tunnel vision when it comes to schoolworks. literally, nothing could ever make her distracted from education because she prioritizes it more than anything else.

with her back hunched over the table at the school library, she had failed to see someone peeking over her head.

with her source of light got dimmed, that was where she looked up and saw the person she was [not] dying to see.

“joohyun unnie,” jennie greets, then goes back to what she’s writing. “do you need help with something?”

“now, why would you assume that i would ask for your help?” the student council president coolly says.

“then what do you need?”

“just came by to see how you are doing.”

“i’m fine, just busy as you can see.”

joohyun hums, and that makes jennie pause.

“what does that mean?” she asks.

“nothing,” the senior starts to walk away then pauses, “oh, there’s a small gathering next weekend.”

“yeah, and?”

“the band organized it,” joohyun shrugs, “make sure you pass by.”

jennie watches the senior walk away, now contemplating whether she should go or not. and while joohyun unnie practically ordered her to ‘pass by’, she knows that she didn’t mean to literally stay at the so called, ‘gathering’.

but still, she’s not so sure about seeing chaeyoung again.

jennie sighs and returns to her work again with a certain blonde in the back of her mind.

the thing is, jennie is not deliberately avoiding chaeyoung.

it’s just that she has way too much school work that needs to be done on time. and she isn’t on her phone that much lately, besides of posting her weekly photos in the gram, so she isn’t replying to anyone as much as they (her friends) complain about it.

but it’s been four weeks since the college fair, and things have been hectic at her classes and the company.

juggling with the thesis, paperwork from the company, and hanging out with her friends, jennie hasn’t got much time for herself lately. and it’s draining her out. quick.

and she may have completely forgot to attend the small gathering due to a paper that was due the following morning, and her perfectionist self refused to stand up from her work chair at the new place she got very much closer to the campus.

it was just two blocks away so she won’t need a car, unless it’s raining or driving to the company, and sad (or best, as her best friend insists) part is that her loft is next to jisoo’s.

sad (okay maybe, not that sad) part is the constant rampage of her friends at her place since it was always stocked with food (courtesy of her parents who sends someone to deliver the said supplies).

about the small gathering, she swears that it was completely not on purpose. it wasn’t her fault that nayeon only sent her a text of ‘see you later’. how was she supposed to know that she was referring to the event? nayeon almost lives with her, for goodness sakes. and besides, her friends know how much of an overachiever she is when it comes to studies.

and with her mom occasionally asking her to lend a hand in handling some of the reports of the company, she’s bound to the duties and responsibilities.

so to say that jennie avoids chaeyoung, seems a bit of a stretch.

but she has to admit, not seeing the blonde has its perks and peeves.

for the peeves, she misses her terribly. she misses when chaeyoung would lean her head on her shoulder whenever she watches a documentary. she misses when chaeyoung would poke at her cheeks and smile at her when she’s busy studying for a quiz. she misses when chaeyoung would hug her from behind when she would make coffee in the morning. she misses when chaeyoung sing softly to kuma and that she’ll make a silly face at her when jennie catches her doing so.

jennie misses chaeyoung.

the smile. the laugh. the eyes. the lips.

god, she misses kissing her.

ever since chaeyoung, nobody had been able to par with her. and it sucks because kissing strangers have been one of the things that jennie enjoys.

the rush it gives her usually is enough to tame her sexual desires, but ever since chaeyoung, it isn’t and it pisses her off more than it should.

now, with three weeks of no kisses or sex, she admits that maybe the need for release is getting on her. if it isn’t obvious by the lengthy showers she would have in the night.

but, besides from missing chaeyoung and the frustrating celibate, the perks is, well-

nothing.

avoiding chaeyoung absolutely does her no good.

(okay, maybe she is avoiding chaeyoung but not completely.)

the good thing probably is that she’s finishing the paperworks from the company much faster than a usual office worker, and that she’s been getting straight A’s, and that she’s not risking her life out on the club with a bunch of people with possible herpes.

but it doesn’t quell her feelings for chaeyoung at all.

so, there’s no perks.

it takes her a few days later to realize that she may be a bit hopeless at stomping over her feelings for a certain blonde.

it was saturday night, and as usual, jennie was in her desk working on the paperworks that her parents had asked her to check for a possible partnership with a foreign company.

she skipped out (again) from partying at jackson’s that day, not really up for any partying at the moment due to the work that she’s been given.

it was nearing nine when she hears nayeon barges in with a shout of “jennie, come out and drink!”

of course, she sighs in exhaustion. both from work and possibly handling another hyperactive drunk bunny. she somberly looks at the stacks of papers beside of her and decides that she’ll continue it tomorrow. the meeting is still a month away so she has time to work on it tomorrow at her parents’ house.

jennie steps out and sees nayeon arranging the soju bottles, sweet snacks, spicy stir fried squid, and of course, a box of chicken wings.

“first question,” she raises one finger, “why are there a lot of snacks? second, why are you here? i thought you were at jackson’s with the two idiots and one responsible person.” (pertaining to jeongyeon, jisoo and jihyo respectively.)

nayeon pats the space beside her, “sit first.”

jennie follows and looks at her friend weirdly. she notices that there’s something going on with the buck toothed girl, and decides to wait for her to spill it out.

“one, because i skipped dinner. two, i’m heartbroken.” nayeon simply says, pouring the soju on an empty cup.

“heartbroken? why?” jennie inquiries while opening the tin foil and letting the steam out of the squid.

“you know son chaeyoung? the art student freshie?”

“yeah, met her once. why?”

nayeon sips from her cup before breaking off the chopstick, “yeah, turns out, she and mina have been going out since the college fair.”

“she what?!” jennie almost shouts.

“yup, and the reason why she asked to meet me that night was to tell me that she can’t accept my feelings because she just said yes to chaeyoung.” nayeon blows on the warm squid before eating it.

“wait, why did you tell me just now? do the others know?” jennie furrows her eyebrows.

nayeon shakes her head, “you’re the first one i told.”

“then why did it take you so long?”

“at that time, it hasn’t really sunk on me that the girl i’ve been in love with for three years, whom i thought was straight, has a girlfriend now.” nayeon laughs, devoid of humor.

“nay, i’m so sorry.” jennie hugs the bunny toothed girl. when she lets go, a wave of sympathy washes over her as she sees nayeon’s eyes shine with unshed tears.

“yah, it’s okay, it’s my fault.” nayeon sniffs, then empties her cup. “i was too afraid of ruining the friendship that we had and missed my chance.”

jennie listens, not sure what to say that would make her friend feel any better.

“aish, screw this and let’s get drunk!” nayeon hollers and plays some music on the speakers she brought with her.

“ah, does jihyo know you’re here already?” jennie presses pause, making the engineer frown.

“yeah, but for now, help me forget this dumb fuck of love with alcohol!”

for the entire night, the both of them dance to heartbreak songs then sing to sappy love songs that isn’t about love but longing. jennie didn’t drink a lot because as much as nayeon demands her to just because she’s older, right now, she knows that the older girl needs someone to look out for her.

after seven bottles of soju, nayeon sings ‘one of these nights’ by the girl group with a dessert name, while holding a bottle, and jennie is recording the whole thing.

for future purposes.

she stops recording when she sees nayeon shed a tear, that turns into two, until it doesn’t seem like it would stop any time soon. she grabs the nearest cloth near her, which is nayeon’s sleep shirt, and hugs the older girl. 

she lets nayeon cry, not saying anything because she knows nothing she’ll say will make her feel any better. she feels nayeon shake underneath her fingertips and she thinks that if getting your heart broken will make you weak and vulnerable like this, she’d rather not experience it at all.

eventually the tears dry out, and nayeon lifts her head and wipes the tears with the shirt jennie gave her.

“you should go to sleep, unnie.” jennie softly says, “i’ll help you to the bed.”

nayeon nods, her energy now drained, and lets herself be guided towards the guest bedroom that she frequents on some days.

after brushing her teeth and changing into a comfortable pajamas, jennie tugs the sheets up to nayeon’s chest.

“hey, jennie,” nayeon mumbles with eyes shut. “remember what you said to me at the fair?”

“yeah,”

“i’m saying it back to you now.” nayeon pauses, “don’t miss out, okay?”

jennie’s hand stills.

“thanks for being a good friend too.”

and with that, nayeon goes to dreamland.

jennie sighs, hopefully, dreams won’t let nayeon get heartbroken again.

as she cleans the living room, jennie hears another knock at the front door.

she figures that it must be one of her friends, most likely jeongyeon or jisoo, since they pass by her place just for some milk after a night of drinking.

she looks down at her clothes and sees traces of tears. she contemplates whether or not to change into something, at least, presentable. but hearing another knock again, she decides against it. she reasons out that her friends have already seen her at her worst, so what the hell, right?

what she didn’t expect is to see the person that she expects the least.

“chaeyoung-ah,” jennie mutters out, a mix of surprise and dread already at the pit of her stomach.

“hey, jennie unnie, mind letting me in?” the blonde jokes, though the tone of her voice says otherwise.

she steps aside and lets the younger in. she immediately collects the garbage and places it at the bin near the door. when she sees the blonde sitting by the couch, she makes a beeline to her room to change into a more presentable comfort wear.

after changing, she goes to the kitchen to prepare two cups of tea. while waiting, she drums her fingers on the counter, questions with the answer on the palm of chaeyoung’s hand running through her head.

how did she get here?

how did she know where she lived?

why is she here?

does joy know she’s here?

why does she look so pretty?

jennie grips the counter harder, reminding herself to focus, but her mind seems like it has a replay button on its own.

chaeyoung does look pretty. with her black dress fitting to her perfect figure, to the soft curls of her blonde hair, to the soft make up that makes her appearance a hundred times more attractive.

she is pretty. 

way too pretty to be out in this night.

she hears the timer stop, and lifts the tea bag from the cups. with two mugs on her hand, she walks back to the living room and places them in the coaster by the small table that was once filled with snacks and liquor. she sits across from where chaeyoung sat and waits for her to ask.

a wave of silence fills the space between them.

jennie notices that chaeyoung is nibbling at her bottom lip, and somehow, the need to have it in between hers is overwhelming that she has to look away.

but at the same time, she notices that the blonde only does that whether she’s uncertain of something.

someone has to talk at some point. might as well as be her.

“how did you know?” jennie asks.

“i forced jisoo unnie,” chaeyoung answers directly, already knew what she’s implying. “why?”

“need a place closer to the campus.”

“no, i meant, why did you leave that day?”

the dire need to run away fills jennie’s senses.

“i had an emergency back home,” she easily lies, “i thought jisoo told you?”

chaeyoung fiddles with her mug, “i was waiting for you to tell me, not jisoo unnie.”

jennie admits that it’s her mistake that she didn’t bother to inform chaeyoung the slight change of plans, and it brings her a sense of guilt of doing so.

“i’m sorry,” she utters, before clearing her throat. “how did you get here?”

“jisoo unnie,” chaeyoung answers immediately.

jennie curses jisoo in her head and promises to herself that she will throw her out of the building with no remorse and use her most embarrassing pictures at the funeral.

“you ignored me for weeks,” chaeyoung meekly asks, “why?”

“i was busy with the school-“

“jennie, look at me.” she hears chaeyoung gently say.

she tightens her jaws at the mention of her name, but complies. and as she stares at the doe eyes, her walls almost collapsed. chaeyoung’s eyes are filled with confusion and hurt and a hint of rage.

“why?” chaeyoung struggles to keep the hurt away from her voice, but, jennie hears it.

“i was busy, chaeyoung.” jennie still stands by her earlier statement, and even she can hear the sound of bullshit in it.

“busy enough to ignore my messages?” the blonde almost snaps, but reins herself in.

“i have things that are more important to take care of first,” jennie counters before she can even think about the effect of her words.

chaeyoung scoffs, “and you’ve made that very clear, so congratulations on that.”

jennie grits her teeth, frustrated at herself for getting it this far. this is the first time that they’ve been hostile at each other, and it almost pains her to be even at this state with chaeyoung.

a moment of silence suspends between them.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t mean that.” she resigns to the fact that the only way to resolve this would be being honest. “i’m sorry for disregarding your concerns too, it’s wrong and unfair.”

jennie sees the tense shoulders of the blonde relax a bit, and that she fiddles with her fingers once again.

“i’m sorry too, that was out of line.” the blonde sighs in regret. “it’s just, i’m really hurt, jen. you don’t do that to your friends.”

_friends, huh_? jennie thinks as a painful stab hits her in the chest.

“i’m sorry,” she says once again, “i just needed time to think.”

“about?”

jennie looks away, not seeing another flash of hurt in chaeyoung’s eyes.

“is it the same thing that’s bothering you at the college fair?” she hears the blonde softly ask.

“yeah,” jennie mumbles.

“is there anything i can do to help?”

this is it.

this maybe it.

jennie could either be brave and jump straight on and just end this stupid feelings so she could move on and live happily or she could hide this and bury this as deep as it gets so she won’t look like the stupid idiot that fell for someone she had casual sex with.

but the thing is, she’s never been the brave one.

yes, she likes it when things are in her control, but the things are usually in her favor, hence she rarely had a hard time with it.

however, another person’s feelings aren’t in her favor and control.

and that this night could either go both ways.

be forgiven or be humiliated and rejected.

which would it be?

“it’s getting late, we could talk about this in the morning.” is what jennie said.

she’s not ready for this.

she needs time.

she needs time to be brave.

and unfortunately, she isn’t brave tonight.

chaeyoung looks at her with sad eyes and it pulls on jennie’s heartstrings.

god, she looks like a sad chipmunk.

back then, jennie would feel like she committed a crime whenever chaeyoung makes a sad face. and at that time, she vowed to herself that she would never make chaeyoung sad because it will taint her record on the blonde’s slambook of friends.

(she’s adorably nerdy like that.)

((and she cares for her reputation back then.))

(((reputation on chaeyoung’s slambook.)))

and now, she still feels like she committed a crime.

“did jisoo drive you here?” she shifts her gaze to a place where she doesn’t get the need to kiss the blonde or worse, confess to her on a whim.

“she was drunk, so technically i did the driving,” chaeyoung says, “though she said to me to tell you that she locked her door.”

that idiot.

“okay,” jennie sighs, “you can take my room, i’ll sleep at the room across with nayeon.”

“nayeon unnie is here?” the blonde doesn’t bother to hide the surprise in her voice.

“she came earlier than you did.”

“oh,” chaeyoung looks at the couch, “i’m not taking your room, i can sleep just fine here.”

jennie shakes her head, “no, you’re the guest, so take my room.”

beats later, chaeyoung laughs, “deja vu, right?”

“yeah,” jennie doesn’t stop the smile from slipping out of her lips. “but, seriously, take my room. i think i still have some of your clothes by the drawer, so i’ll take it out.”

“thank you,” the blonde lets out.

“did you have dinner? i could make some if you like.” jennie starts to stand up, however was stopped by chaeyoung’s hand on her arm.

the blonde must’ve noticed it and retracts it, “sorry, but, it’s alright i’m not really hungry.”

“are you sure?” jennie decides to tease, “you were always hungry back then.”

she sees chaeyoung bite her lip to stop a smile from coming out, “fine, maybe i’m a little bit hungry. there isn’t anything edible at the party.”

at the pout, jennie melts inside, and at that, she looks away, hoping to qualm the need to kiss it away.

“i’ll grab you something comfy to wear first. be right back.”

jennie opens her closet and picks up the clothes by the paper bag labelled, rosie. she had plans to return it if she had some time, but guess her busy schedule has its own silver linings. when she steps out of the room, she sees the small balcony open and senses that chaeyoung must’ve admiring the view. she knows the blonde has a thing for city landscapes at night.

“bathroom is by the right,” jennie sets the clothes by the couch, “there are towels in the cabinets and spare toothbrush by the drawer.”

chaeyoung turns her head, and once again, jennie is in awestruck at how pretty she looks.

“thank you,” the blonde gives her a small smile.

“you’re welcome.”

jennie lies awake.

she can’t sleep knowing that chaeyoung is on the other room, in her bed, probably asleep already because she’s always been the first one to doze off between them.

she sighs heavily, her thoughts still rampant about the fact that chaeyoung sought her out and came on her own. truthfully, she expected that chaeyoung wouldn’t mind that jennie had been distant, but a small hopeful part of her says otherwise. and it was conflicting to be in terms of what she should do. 

minutes later, she falls asleep to the sound of nayeon’s snores, hoping that the jennie tomorrow will know what to do and wishing that everything will be in her favor.

“jen!”

jennie groans loudly as nayeon shakes her shoulders with so much force. “what do you want?”

“there’s a someone in the kitchen!”

she opens one eye and sees the wide eyes of im nayeon. “and?”

“is she for me?”

“what?” jennie sits up and leans on the headboard.

“i mean, i know you’re trying to help me mend my broken heart but hiring an escort for me this early is too much, right?” nayeon babbles, not noticing the confusion in the younger girl.

“so like, i went to pee, and then i smelled bacon and then i was really confused because you refuse to wake up before dawn and i thought it was jisoo and then, bam!” nayeon claps her hand loudly, “a blonde with long legs and a killer figure.”

“have you even seen her face?”

“no,” the older girl shakes her head, “i ran here as fast as i could! now, who is she?”

“talk to her, nay. i’m trying to sleep, bother me later.” jennie groans, then pushes nayeon off of her and goes under the blankets to get more sleep. 

but nayeon is relentless and keeps on tugging jennie’s cotton shirt and whining her name right in her ear. she can’t go outside! she hasn’t got any money on her to pay in advance! (if the blonde in the kitchen is, indeed, an escort).

after ten minutes of incessant whining, jennie gives sits up and sends the bunny toothed girl the most pissed off glare she can muster.

jennie steps out first, obviously, with nayeon behind her. she was still mad at the older girl and plans to kick her out later (when nayeon does feel better). with a scowl on her face, she enters the kitchen and sees once again the beauty of park chaeyoung in the morning.

her scowl almost slips, but doesn’t when nayeon suddenly shouts in her ear and bumps her to hug chaeyoung.

“chaengie!” nayeon greets and hugs the blonde. “i thought you were an escort! i’m sorry about that.”

“good morning, unnie.” chaeyoung grins in amusement, and settles a confused gaze on jennie. “good morning to you too, jennie.”

the brunette only grunts, pulling out a chair and placing her head on the countertop.

“ignore grumpy this morning.” nayeon tells the blonde, then smirks when an idea hits her. “maybe you can help her be in a better mood so she won’t kick me out today?”

“yah, im nayeon-ssi,” jennie narrows her eyes at the cheeky engineer, “you want me to spread your videos from yesterday?”

nayeon’s eyes widen dramatically, “what did you do?”

breakfast was something else.

with jennie being grumpy, nayeon with her annoyingly teasing mood, and a unsure and shy chaeyoung, it was bound for the silence to be broken by any moment.

“so, kids, what are your plans for today?” nayeon starts as she shoves a bite of bacon and egg.

jennie sees chaeyoung glance at her before looking at nayeon, “i have to stop at someplace at noon, unnie.”

“oh? where will you go?” the oldest asks.

“i volunteer at the animal shelter every sunday,” the blonde bites lip. “we help the staff there feed the animals or get them adopted or give them baths.”

“daebak! that’s really great, chaeng,” nayeon says, fascinated at the blonde. “maybe i can help next week, i’ll have to ask my friends to join too.”

“i’ll let the staffs know, unnie,” chaeyoung smiles before sipping her coffee.

jennie is also equally, or more, amazed at the blonde. is there anything that chaeyoung can do that can help her quell her feelings for her? because lately, she notices that everything about chaeyoung is so likable that it’s impossible to not like her at all.

of course, she doesn’t say anything. her mood still sour with the way nayeon forced her to be up that early.

“what about you, jennie the grumpy dumpling?” nayeon teases, and chaeyoung lets out a small laugh. “what plans do you have for this fine sunday?”

“work.” jennie grunts, her gaze on her own plate.

“aish, don’t give me that crap. surely you can make time for yourself.” the older pauses, and an idea pops in her head. “hey, why don’t you go with chaeng?”

“what?” jennie snaps her head up.

“yeah, go unwind or something. you’ve been cooped up in here for too long, and the last party you went to was a week ago! and you went home early!” nayeon points her fork at jennie. “i order you to go out or i’ll call omma kim and tell her that you’ve been skipping meals for work.”

“you wouldn’t dare.” jennie glares at nayeon.

“then go out.” nayeon smugly crosses her arms. “if it’s alright with you, chaeng?”

“huh?” the blonde looks a bit lost.

“jennie can come with you, right?”

“of course! i’d be happy to bring you there.” chaeyoung brushes a stray strand behind her ear. “it’ll be fun too.”

nayeon claps, “then it’s settled. you kids will go out while i take advantage of the huge bathtub in jennie’s room.”

jennie continues to eat and notices that under the table, chaeyoung’s feet tapping the floor repeatedly which she only does when she’s excited of something.

her chest suddenly warms at the thought of chaeyoung being excited to spend time with her. she’s glad that she’s not the only one who misses their bonding times that doesn’t revolve around the bedroom activities.

not liking chaeyoung is really hard.

there is something about sundays in the city of seoul that jennie particularly loves. it's the rare serenity that resurfaces just every weekend, the calm atmosphere after a week of bustling commuters and loud engines of the vehicles, and the fresh (or as fresh as the city air can get) smell of the mid-morning. the cold crisp of the wind may also count. with the chill caressing her cheeks, she burrows her chin slightly to her brown scarf and snuggles into the her thick coat even more. she takes note of the blonde beside her, with her cheeks and nose slightly pink, she coos silently in her head. 

_how adorable._

their whole walk towards the animal shelter was a bit stiff, in jennie's terms. she doesn't know how to open up what they talked about yesterday again, and also a tiny part of her isn't looking forward to being vulnerable to someone like chaeyoung. not that she doesn't like it, rather, she's afraid she might spill everything and end up looking stupid. so yes, the atmosphere between them was stiff and a relief.

(at least, in her case.)

also, the need to hold the blonde's hand is increasingly tempting, but she shoves her hands deeper into the pockets of coat.

they arrive at a shelter with red walls on the outside and an almost-modern looking roof. the sign 'Seoul Animal Shelter' in big yellow letters hangs in the overhead of the door. chaeyoung pushes the door first, and gives a subtle nod to jennie, giving her a cue to go in first. she utters a thanks, and heads inside. upon entering the building, she's immediately greeted with the usual scent of an animal shelter. she sees rows of glass boxes with holes in the sides, and inside it are the adorable animals that welcomes her with various sounds.

she sees chaeyoung talking to a girl by the counter, and she approaches the laughing duo. the unfamiliar woman first notices her, and chaeyoung lets out a small 'ah!'.

"unnie, she's the one i'm telling you about." chaeyoung eyes her before grabbing her cuffs of her coat, "her name's jennie and she'll be helping out with me."

"oh, you're jennie," the lady says, noting the an unfamiliar glint in her eyes. "my name's hyeri, i manage this shelter along with my friends."

jennie bows her head slightly, "thank you for having me, unnie."

"i should be thanking you," hyeri laughs, "we're actually understaffed and without you, chaengie would be the only one who'll feed these babies." she motions to the animals.

"yeji didn't come?" the blonde asks, "that's weird."

"she suddenly got the flu," hyeri slightly frowns, "and ryujin took the afternoon shift so she can take care of her."

"their friendship is kinda cute," chaeyoung softly says, "we're gonna go in, is it okay?"

"sure, but get jennie-ssi an apron first." hyeri tells the blonde.

chaeyoung looks at jennie with an excited smile, "i'll be right back, okay?"

jennie nods and waits for the blonde. she rocks in her heels, feeling a bit awkward at hyeri who is now looking at her with a smile that holds a tiny secret.

"you like her." hyeri suddenly says.

"w-what?," jennie stutters, and sees the older girl's smile growing wider second by second. "no, i don't."

"it wasn't a question," hyeri chuckles, "don't worry, i won't tell. you're not the only one."

jennie tenses a bit lightly, unsure what to do with the sudden confession, but the older quickly notices it.

"not like that! gosh, she's like a sister to me." the older laughs, "i meant, like everyone else in this city."

"what do you mean?" jennie scrunches her eyebrows in confusion.

hyeri rests her elbows on the counter, "every sunday, the shelter is packed because they're here to see chaeng and ryujin, another volunteer."

"does ryujin also...?" jennie trails off the question.

“no,” the older girl shakes her head, “that girl is head over heels for her best friend.”

jennie only nods, relief weirdly settling in her stomach. she wants to ask some questions, but she isn’t sure if it’s okay and that hyeri might snitch on chaeyoung. thankfully, the older notices her conflict.

“you can ask me a question, i won’t tell.” hyeri assures her with a grin, “but you better hurry because chaeng might come back any minute.”

jennie bites the inside of her cheek and says the thought that’s been bothering her for a long time, “how do i get her to like me back?”

hyeri hums thoughtfully, “honestly, we’ve been friends for over three years and i’ve never heard her mention anything related about romantic feelings. but, believe me when i tell you this, continue whatever you’re doing.”

”what do you mean?”

”i mean, when i heard that you ghosted her for almost a month-“

”i didn’t ghost her.”

”-she came here ranting to me about you,” the older girl says, “and the fact that it’s the first time she got upset over a someone.”

”first time?”

”that girl is pure as a snow, she literally never gets mad. one time, lisa pranked her and placed a red dye in her shampoo, and she came in looking like ariel’s distant cousin.” hyeri laughs at the memory of a nonchalant red head two years ago.

“worst part is, she looked good in it.” hyeri groans jokingly, and jennie laughs, though she expected that any color will fit chaeyoung.

”but, the best part is that the adoptions that day kept coming through. who knew a face like that would do good in this world?”

jennie agrees, chaeyoung certainly is certainly part of the ‘good’ in this world. even if she only knew her for over four months or so, she believes that the blonde has a nature of bringing and giving the good in this lifetime.

”what are you guys talking about?” chaeyoung steps out of the room with a red apron in her hand.

”just your ariel days,” hyeri snickers.

”unnie, don’t embarrass me, please.” the blonde pouts.

”i didn’t!” the oldest raises her hand in defense, “aish, go start feeding the babies. remember to help jennie if she ever needs to, okay?”

”yes, unnie.” chaeyoung hands jennie the apron, “don’t worry, it’s fresh out of laundry. let’s go get their food in the supply room.”

jennie starts to follow the blonde when she suddenly hears hyeri call her name. 

“remember what i said earlier, okay?” the manager winks.

she bows slightly, and a smile reaches her face. she sees chaeyoung send her a questioning glance before opening the door, but opts to stay mum. who knew that coming to the animal shelter had its perks?

for the next two hours, they’ve arranged bowls filled with each animals’ usual food. chaeyoung put jennie in charge of the dogs and turtles, while the blonde handled the birds, cats and the fishes. they worked together diligently, some moments where they talk for a while, usually about the stories of how the animals came into the shelter. it was fun. it was comfortable. and she got to see the caring side of chaeyoung to the animals.

jennie couldn’t help it, but she adored the blonde more and more as she greets each animal with a bright smile as if she was their owner. the dogs wagging their tails and coddling her, the cats purring as they get scratched behind their favorite spots by the blonde, the birds flapping their wings slightly at the sound of her humming, and even the fishes swim slightly more faster than usual! (or the fishes are just hungry).

honestly, chaeyoung could pass as snow white with flying colors.

but alas, her private show of ‘chaeyoung and her adorableness’ has come to an end when hyeri calls for them to take the dogs out in the yard to play. 

the thing is, the yard is open to the public. anyone can come in and take a view of the dogs playing around and be the serotonin boosts that they are for the city. which also means, that they will be out too.

before going out into the yard, hyeri talks to them by the door.

”chaeyoung-ah, i have a feeling that the adoptions today will be plenty compared to the past few weeks.”

”why is that, unnie?” the blonde already puzzled.

”you brought jennie in!” hyeri places her hands on the shorter girl, surprising her a bit.

”me?” jennie confusingly asks.

”the both of you, work hard, alright?” hyeri grins, “see you both in an hour.”

two hours later, jennie steps out first from the shelter.

she feels the embarrassment still rushing in her body as she recalls the recent events of what transpired between her and chaeyoung earlier.

twenty minutes into the yard, everything was going smoothly until chaeyoung was approached by a group of teenagers. at first, she didn’t pay that much notice until she heard a dog growling, and when she did see what’s happening, her body automatically moved on its own.

she walked towards chaeyoung, and stood beside her.

“is there a problem here?” jennie asked, her glare solely focused on the middle guy who had one of his eyebrows raised.

”look, i don’t want any trouble. i was just asking for her number but she said no even after she promised me last week!” the guy said, his posture obviously aggravated.

jennie glanced at chaeyoung, who subtly shook her head, before returning her gaze to the walking version of immaturity and stupidity in front of her. “i suggest you leave, sir.”

the guy scoffed, “who the hell even are you?”

she saw his friends pulling his jacket, trying to get him out of the scene before any ruckus happens.

”i’m her girlfriend,” jennie angrily said, while she slid an arm around chaeyoung and pulled her closer. “leave before i call the authorities.”

”come on, man, just let them be.” the guy with an orange jacket urged his friend, intimidated by the shorter girl’s glare even if he wasn’t the one who’s directed with it.

“she’s not even that pretty,” the guy tried to save the last of his dignity before he stepped away from the growling dogs and the slightly intimidating lady. (he’ll never admit that to his friends, but he did get the shivers.)

the other companions immediately bowed and apologized for the inconvenience before running away for their lives.

jennie, who was still enraged by the last comment, decided that she’s not going to leave the blonde’s side until their jobs are done.

and true to her word, she stuck by chaeyoung the whole hour. often by her side in moments where she talks to some of the people who are interested in adopting, and in moments where they think of getting too friendly with the blonde.

even one elderly couple praised them for being an adorable pair of lovers, which jennie forgot to deny because she was busy shooting glares with another over friendly customer.

jennie covers her face in embarrassment.

after the hour’s up and the pups have to go back to the shelter, she immediately stopped being too close with the blonde and went back on getting the dogs to their respective cages.

she didn’t look at chaeyoung the whole hour.

and she still hasn’t.

she hears the door open, and stares at the orange sky above her.

”hyeri unnie says if you ever want to volunteer again, she’ll be sure to bring your favorite candy.” she hears chaeyoung giggle. “she’s happy that there are many animals that adopted today.”

”my favorite candy?” jennie asks, still staring at the sky.

”i told her that you like sour patches.” chaeyoung mumbles, “would you like to have dinner with me before heading back home?”

jennie glances at chaeyoung. “sure.”

they stop in front of a shop that chaeyoung describes as the ‘best bulgogi that you have ever tasted and that you’ll forget your name after one bite’. it is also a block away from the park that shows an amazing view of the han river.

they take a seat by the window, and jennie lets chaeyoung order for the both of them. she still chooses to stare out of the window, hoping that the blonde won’t bring up that embarrassing event earlier.

”jennie,” she hears chaeyoung softly say.

”yeah?” she mutters.

”look at me.” a tug in her pinky finger takes her eyes off the surroundings outside the shop.

she stares at the thumb and pointer finger that pulls her hand farther away with her pinky.

halfway across the table, chaeyoung flips her hand. she writes ‘thank you’ in her palm, and it tugs jennie’s heartstrings once again.

this time, she looks at the brown eyes that she missed a lot. “it’s no problem.”

“it doesn’t happen a lot, but, if it does, the dogs always have my back.” chaeyoung chuckles under her breathe, “they’ll keep on growling and barking until they go away.”

”you should thank the dogs too with bulgogi.” she jokes, and it works! chaeyoung laughs again.

”i’m very glad that you came at the right time,” chaeyoung confesses, “i got shocked that he suddenly got upset when i didn’t even promise him anything since i wasn’t even there last week.”

”if he ever bothers you again, call me, okay? i’ll ask my friends, jackson and bam, to beat him up for you.” jennie grabs chaeyoung’s hand, and was about to plant a kiss but stopped herself halfway. instead, she awkwardly pats the back of the hand, and lays it on the table.

jennie feels the warmth climb up from her neck as chaeyoung amusedly raises her eyebrows with a teasing glint behind her irises.

dinner was wonderful.

she really missed seeing chaeyoung do a little dance at every bite of the warm and tender beef. they talk a lot too, mainly the things that they missed during the almost-one-month absence. neither of them also mention _that_ , too cautious of cracking the little bubble of comfort between them. but they do tell each other the silliest events, both secretly wishing that they should've been present at the said moments. after dinner, they both fight over on who's paying the bill. usually, they alternate, but most of the time, it's jennie.

(it's not her fault that she gets turned on when she's with chaeyoung, often ending up on asking for the cheque and briskly swiping the card before the blonde can utter any protests.)

but due to _that_ , they both have forgotten whose turn it was.

it ended up in half-sies.

with the condition that jennie will have to treat chaeyoung for an _eomuk bokkeum_ , and the blonde will treat her an ice cream in return.

(jennie thinks that chaeyoung probably wants to spend more time with her.)

((she tells herself to stop being silly.))

(((chaeyoung totally does.)))

a cold wind causes jennie to tug her coat tighter, wishing that she should've brought her car instead of being whipped and agreeing to chaeyoung's wish to walk. she eyes the blonde to her side and sees her shiver ever so slightly, the pink in her cheeks prominent under the yellow streetlights. they exchange small talk, usually revolving around their friends' new hobbies or funny stories to the new toys they've brought for their pets.

"i can't believe you bought your fish another aquarium." jennie watches as chaeyoung excitedly shows her fish's new tank on her phone.

"yeah but it has this little pirate toys and," chaeyoung zooms in for a particular figure, "and there's a little treasure box!"

"you could've brought him, i don't know, another fish?" the older girl suggests, her heart warms when chaeyoung eagerly swipes on her phone and shows her a little blue fish.

"i bought a baby dory!" the blonde says in delight, her eyes impossibly bright.

jennie's breath hitches, taking in the bright and bubbly, angel-in-disguise, korean-aussie lady in front of her. she feels her heart slam loudly between her chest, a new sensation filling up her insides, and for the first time, she welcomes the overwhelming feeling inside of her. she's embracing it. even willing to drown in it. and it's all because of chaeyoung.

her steps falter, letting chaeyoung stride elegantly. the blonde didn't even notice that she'd stopped walking, too engrossed in retelling how the baby dory kept circling the little mermaid toy in the new tank.

"jennie, look at-"

"i am looking at you." jennie gently speaks. her heart now wide open, ready to take the leap. ready to drown. ready to fly. whichever it may be, she knows she won't regret it.

she sees chaeyoung turn, and if it's even possible, the pink in her cheeks more eminent.

jennie takes a breathe, "i like you, chaeyoung."

the silence between them is defeaning.

"i don't have any kind of proper justification or rationalization that explains why," she pauses, "and i also don't think that if it'll be enough for you to understand how serious i am. but, what i could tell you of how it happened."

(chaeyoung is five steps away from jennie, but she could hear every word.)

"i like you because you're kind. too kind, to be honest." jennie laughs under her breath. "remember the moment you sang to kuma when he can't keep still due to the thunderstorms? you thought i was asleep, but i wasn't. and when you volunteered to buy everyone's water when you had that killer practice, and even if you were slightly limping, you still did it without hesitation.

"i like you because you have a knack of making everyone around you smile. remember the little girl who tripped while running in the playground? you looked like just got done with the band practice, and you sat down by the tree and started playing songs just to make her smile. and she did. and soon enough, all the kids stopped playing to listen to you sing. i just happened to see you there before i went home.

"i like you because you are one of the sweetest person that i have ever met." she continues, "you always say yes to jisoo when she invites you to play video games, you can stand nayeon's two hour rants with this focused eyes, you give lisa the biggest hugs even if you both are sweaty, and you let yeri prank you even if you know you're being pranked.

"i like you because," jennie's shoulders sag, "you're you. you're sweet, kind, supportive, compassionate, talented and the lists go on. and your beauty is just a bonus. anyone would be lucky to have you in their life."

she feels her heart steadily calming down, and for a moment, she feels like flying.

who knew that confessing would actually feel this _free_?

"i'm not expecting any answer from you." she tells the blonde, "i only told you because i wanted you to know. about the avoiding thing, i didn't know how to tell you my feelings, that's why i did it. and i’m sorry about that too."

jennie laughs in relief, "it actually feels so good to let it all out."

(chaeyoung is five steps away from jennie. and she heard it all.)

"jennie,"

at the sound of her name, her eyes are immediately on the blonde.

"i want you to listen to me, okay?"

she nods.

"the first time i met you, i thought you were going to be the person that will make a singular print in my life. the type where you only meet a person once, yet something about that person will make you look back every now and then."

first step.

"i don't believe in fates, so imagine my surprise when i saw you again. for me, it meant that, somehow, you were going to be someone important in my life."

second step.

"when we became friends," jennie laughs along with chaeyoung at the word, "as peculiar as it might be given to our situation, i was thankful. i still am. i was contented with what i have with you, and i was happy. and somehow, it slowly dawned on me that if you ever leave, i don't think i can go back to the person who i was before i met you."

third step.

jennie feels the mix of trepidation and hopefulness in the pit of her stomach. she prepares herself for whatever is about to come.

"and you did leave. i was hurt and confused. imagine waiting in your front door for two hours only to find out that you went to your parents' house." chaeyoung laughs at her silliness. "and for the next few days, i waited for you. i had hope that maybe you'll be the one to approach me first, and that you can explain why."

"chaeyoung-ah, i'm sorry," jennie says, regret and guilt eating her insides up.

the blonde continues, "but, you didn't. and it went on for weeks. i thought i'd be able to shrug it off, because, you're just jennie. why would i be hurt by someone who would avoid me with no explanation? you're not even that special."

_that kinda stings, but i guess i deserved it_. jennie thinks as she listens to the taller girl.

fourth step.

"when i saw you again at the party that you went home early to, i knew you weren't just like any other person." chaeyoung exhales, "you're kim jennie. you are intelligent, patient and gentle. underneath your tough attitude, you are very tenderhearted. i see it in various ways on how you treat your friends. you're considerate, thoughtful, and understanding.

"i guess what i'm trying to say is that-"

fifth step.

chaeyoung now stands in front of jennie.

"-i like you too."

jennie thinks her heart is in hyperdrive to Impossible. it's beating too fast. too loud. too good to be true. is this real? is she dreaming?

did she really just hear from park chaeyoung, the girl she's been crushing on since the first time they met, that she likes her too?

she bites her tongue.

yes, it's real.

"i think, this is the part where you kiss me, ms. kim," she hears chaeyoung lovely laugh, and she doubts her reality again.

she feels like she's watching the stupid version of herself who can't speak at the sudden confession of her long time crush.

"let me process it for a moment," is all she can say, and the blonde shakes with laughter. "you're not messing with me, right?"

"no, i’m not!" chaeyoung immediately says then pouts, "did you just doubt my confession?"

“no, no,” jennie denies, “i just- wow,”

“it’s okay, take your time.” chaeyoung gives her a smile.

jennie did take her time, and for the whole entirety of five minutes which includes trying to make sense of the overly exhilarated voices in her head shouting celebratory curses; calming her heart in a manner that she won’t worry about having a case of tachycardia; and listening to chaeyoung hum another old song.

she notices the blonde shiver, but tries to cover it up as she rocks her feet steadily. she unties her scarf, and places it around chaeyoung’s neck.

“you’ll get cold,” chaeyoung frowns, gently pushing the scarf away, “i’m fine, jennie.”

“i’m fine too. just let me, rosie.” she refutes.

the blonde shakes her head, “it’s a little cold, but you don’t have to worry about me.”

so jennie does what she does best.

she pulls chaeyoung by the scarf, surprising the blonde, and kisses her.

and god, she missed this so much. why did she even deprive herself from sweet relief?

it takes a moment, but chaeyoung eventually kisses back, and it brings jennie in another state of euphoria. she feels that her whole body has been electrified and the constant buzzes of bliss slips in between her nerves as they run crazily all throughout her.

eventually, oxygen is needed for they are mere mortals, but the rush of elation does not cease. their lips brush against each other lightly, it doesn’t stop the sign of happiness escaping that forms in a chaeyoung’s lovely smile.

“i know you tied your scarf around me earlier,” the blonde bites her lip, she can’t stop smiling.

jennie leans again, and the blonde instinctively closes her eyes, “you could’ve push me away, you know?”

“i don’t think i can.” warm breath hits her lips, and she’s addicted to the swollen flesh once again.

“thought so,” the shorter girl says in between kisses before letting herself be carried away from the state of elation that she’ll be familiar to for a long time.

———

“what’s the purpose of me being inside your coat?”

“i always wanted to do this to someone.”

“yah, did you just confess because i’m short?!”

“i really do like you, kim jennie.”

“...”

“is it at least warm?”

“yes,” jennie mumbles against chaeyoung’s sweater as she snuggles to the blonde who has her arms (as well as her coat, around her. “i forgot to ask you something.”

”what is it?” the blonde rocks the both of the gently.

”joy,” jennie leans back, “did you really both date?”

chaeyoung nods, “only one time, though, and it was the day after the fair. after that, we decided that we were better off as friends.”

the older girl nods, but inside, she was pleased that the two didn’t work out.

”wait,” chaeyoung squints her eye, “is that why you were gone immediately?”

jennie steps out of the warmth, then grabs the blonde’s right hand, interlocking it with hers before placing it inside her pocket.

“let’s go home.” is all she says, but not without an amused laugh from chaeyoung and her constant teases of ‘can’t believe the great jennie kim got jealous’ to ‘i suddenly feel special and pretty that you got jealous for over someone like me.’

“you are special and beyond beautiful.” jennie suddenly says, then sees in her peripheral vision on how the pink looked wonderful in chaeyoung’s cheeks.

“yah, that’s not fair.”

“can’t i compliment the one i like a lot?”

“i don’t think we’re going work out if you keep this up, ms. kim.”

“i thought i’m your type?”

“you are but-“

“then i don’t see a problem.”

”...”

”...”

“shut up, jennie.”

they walk home together with their hands interlocked, hearts and feelings synchronised, and both are hopeful for the better things.

more so, for jennie.

she can’t wait for the day she can finally call chaeyoung her girlfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a friend of mine told me i should like put commissions or something idk much about that but like they said i could get paid by writing??? idk im a bit apprehensive by it bc i was just fucking around, i mean i love writing essays and shit. but, it feels kinda weird for asking money when i just use writing as a form of enjoyment. idk might be just me.
> 
> ANYWAY  
> i hoped you liked this super long chapter as a way to make it up to u bc i always update late <3333
> 
> the last chapter is the epilogue :c  
> but don’t fret, bc i might post more chapters here based on my diligence. (or you can totally drop a prompt and i CANNOT promise that i will do it, but i probably will bc i like to stress myself.
> 
> i really enjoyed writing this chapter, idk why, maybe i got the writer’s rush idk jaksks 
> 
> for anyone who is still hoping for an update on YAHM, please please please, do not hope that much kdfkd i’m still in the process of rewriting and editing and idk i’ll post something if i get satisfied by it.
> 
> also, i apologize for any misspellings or errors or typos or grammatically incorrect sentences. AND please leave your comments! ily stay safe! (im so sorry for the long ass end notes)
> 
> #BlackLivesMatter


	9. the variations of contentment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for patience ㅜㅜ

jennie doesn't really consider herself a romantic person. growing up, the books she mostly found relief are those that range to science fiction or mystery, or any plot that she deems interesting. mostly, the subject of space and time and all the nerdy stuff that kids never really enjoy. she even remembers the time where she cringed at a romantic scene in a sci-fi movie. at those times, she never really saw romance as a necessity.

when she met nayeon, her perception about romance changed, if one can consider it 'change'.

it was during high school and the trio, jennie, jisoo and nayeon, aren't strangers anymore to the world of crushes and confessions. especially, jennie.

back then, she used to cringe at a simple act of kissing or holding hands or giving their partner a gift. but ever since the fateful day that she was dared by nayeon to do seven minutes of heaven (her immaturity hasn't changed) with a girl she doesn't really remember, it sort of changed.

after that classic dare, jennie found out that she particularly enjoys the physical part of romance.

but the thing is, she doesn't catch feelings like everyone else she's been with. and, with her brutal honesty, she winds up breaking a few hearts from both teams.

truth to be told, if high school-jennie ever saw college-jennie, she would've had a whiplash.

because now, she just bought her girlfriend a lunch and a flower.

high school-jennie would most likely cringe at her, maybe even scoff because jennie and 'romance' don't mix. ever.

oh how she'd love to see the face of her past self.

jennie walks towards the dance studio where the current troupe are having a practice for a nationwide competition. she adjusts her bag and grips the paper bag filled with the blonde's favorite, and her favorite flower in the other. upon arriving at the door, she takes a peek and sees them still dancing by count.

and by the middle, she sees her.

her ever so lovely, tall, super fit, and utterly gorgeous girlfriend, park chaeyoung.

she slowly opens the door, careful not to cause a disturbance, and places her stuff by the table. while searching for chaeyoung's bag, she fails to see nayeon coming out of the bathroom with a yellow jacket on.

"jennie?"

at the sound of her name, she looks up and sees her buck toothed best friend.

"what are you doing here, nay?" she asks, confused on why the brunette was here in the first place.

"uh, i-," nayeon stutters, "let's talk outside, shall we?"

jennie can only nod, and once she sees the familiar brown bag of her girlfriend, she picks it up and puts it beside her belongings. after that, she follows nayeon outside the door.

"so?" she urges the girl with the fresh haircut.

it was a week after she confessed to chaeyoung and she was thinking of ways on how to properly ask the blonde to be her girl, when nayeon suddenly barges in the door (once again), sporting a shoulder length haircut with her cheeks flushed. turns out, she was drunk with jisoo when they went to the salon; with the older, heartbroken, and the other, too spontaneous for her own good.

"i did not know you were coming here!" nayeon awkwardly laughs, her bunny teeth showing underneath the bright sun.

jennie narrows her eyes, "are you here for mina? nay, i told you-"

"no, no!" the brunette shakes her head and sighs, "sana asked me to come."

"sana? the one with the orange hair?"

nayeon nods, "ginger, and yeah, she invited me out for lunch."

"isn't she friends with mina?" jennie raises an eyebrow, "what are you planning?"

"n-no! it's not me, i swear." the short haired brunette groans, "she invited me out, that's all."

"what do you mean 'it's not me'?" the younger one asks.

nayeon plays with the hem of her sweater, "she said she'll help me with mina."

jennie sighs, a hint of sympathy in her eyes, "hate to remind you again, but mina is in a relationship right now."

"i mean, like moving on."

jennie can only nod, obviously taken by surprise. she didn't expect that sana, a part of the tight knit trio along with momo and mina, would be willing to help out her best friend, nayeon, even if she's still smitten by the youngest japanese. certainly, it's a bit odd for someone to help out in moving on, especially when you're best friends with the said person. and it's not bad to ask why.

"what's the catch?" jennie narrows her eyes, her protectiveness already stepping out in its cage once again.

nayeon bites her lip, a hint of wariness behind her irises, "that's the thing we'll talk about later."

the younger crosses her arms, "have you told jeong and jihyo? they know more about sana in a personal level."

"i haven't," a bashful grin comes out from nayeon, and jennie's tiny gasp can't be stopped. "it's just, i don't know how to tell them."

"why not?"

"i don't know," nayeon lets out a breathe, "they've known sana for a while, and i have no idea how they'll react to it."

"well, it's your choice. but be sure to tell them," jennie pointedly says, "i'm not going to risk jeongyeon whining how unfair that i knew first for four hours."

"sorry about that," nayeon laughs, "you here for your girlfriend, right?"

now, it's jennie's turn to be bashful. she plays it off by coughing, hiding the flush climbing up in her neck.

"yeah," she struggles to not let out a smile at the thought of a perky blonde.

"omo," nayeon guffaws, "you look love sick!"

jennie glares at her nayeon, "i'm not! i mean, not yet anyway."

"so you are," the short haired brunette raises her brows playfully, "you know? the f word."

"it's hard not to fall," jennie looks to the window and sees rosie talking animatedly with lisa. "i think they're done, we should get inside."

jennie goes in first, followed by nayeon, and the duo immediately focuses their gaze on their crushes. now, it's not rocket science for anyone else in the room on how enamored she is to chaeyoung. almost every person in the room can notice how her eyes are solely on the bubbly blonde, whom despite of just finishing a killer practice led by seulgi, still manages to emit bursts of energy, noticeable even from a mile away.

after the news spread out that jennie is in a relationship with the darling of the art department, it's not unforeseeable that admirers that used to flock around them would feel blue. but, for jennie, she feels daresay, _giddy_. or even extremely elated that she gets to finally call chaeyoung _hers._ she even remembers how nervous she was before she asked chaeyoung to be her girlfriend.

it was two weeks after the confession, and jennie picked up chaeyoung after her evening class. and instead of their usual destination, either her loft or chaeyoung's, she drove to the place where she'd planned to ask the blonde a nerve-wrecking (at least, for her) question. chaeyoung, at first, was confused by the sudden change, but decided to just let jennie lead the way. after an hour, they were inside a dome greenhouse, just by the edge of seoul.

although it's painfully obvious on how much jennie has spent to rent the whole building, hire the hotel's chefs and servers, place the tables and chairs and the essentials for their first (official) date, she's happy with the way chaeyoung's eyes shined bright under the warm light. after they ate, she and chaeyoung walked around the greenhouse, and most of the time, the blonde was sharing snippets of facts and trivias on certain plants. while jennie half listened and half admired. there's something about chaeyoung looking absolutely gorgeous even if she says nerdy things.

the way her heart runs a thousand miles per hour and a whole zoo having a rampage in her belly doesn't help at all, but she pushes through. she likes chaeyoung a lot, adores her even. there's something about chaeyoung that makes jennie somewhat a better person.

and also the fact that having someone like chaeyoung would be an _absolute_ blessing.

"did you know that daisies comes from old english word "daes eage", meaning 'day's eye'," chaeyoung still babbled to jennie, who is enamored, yet secretly nervous. "their petals close at evening and open at dawn, like it's a mark of the beginning of a new day."

she glanced at jennie, and tried to fight the blush that crept steadily to her cheeks due to her deep, yet warm, gaze.

"did you also know that daisies are related to sunflo-" chaeyoung sensed that jennie stopped walking, and she looked at her once again, her warm irises filled with a hint of nervousness and determination.

"rosie, i have to ask you something." jennie said after a while, her heart racing at the speed of a rollercoaster.

"what is it?" the blonde bit the insides of her lip, a bubbling feeling sprouted in her chest.

jennie stalls, a singe of doubt slowly creeping up her chest. _what if she turns me down?_

the blonde must've sensed the inner turmoil from the older girl and squeezes jennie's fingers, silently encouraging her with just a gaze. and maybe a hint of promise.

"will you make me the happiest and be mine?" jennie's heart beat in a staccato rhythm, and it's only for her favorite girl.

chaeyoung's eyes widened slightly, cheeks already flushed to the prettiest pink, and jennie feels like she's about to fall all over again.

"yes," the blonde grinned widely, then stepped closer to jennie with her hands gently brushing the cheeks she'd come to adore. "will you be mine too?"

jennie's smile cannot possibly grow any more bigger, and leans her forehead to the blonde's. "ah, park chaeyoung-ah, i think my heart is about to burst."

a lovely laugh escapes chaeyoung's pretty mouth, "good thing i'll be taking care of it from now on."

jennie wants to kiss her.

"yeah, you will."

and she did.

they kissed underneath the lemon tree for the first time as girlfriends, though jennie got a little bit excited and ended up on giving the blonde a hickey. or two. or three.

she wasn't sure, but the furrow in chaeyoung's eyebrows, the redness of her cheeks, and a scarf around her neck indicated that she may have gone a little too excited. thankfully, jennie gave her girl the best night of her life, and she didn't get any scolding from her about public indecency.

(to be frank, jennie thought chaeyoung was into that given that one time where she'd came too fast while they were in the library.)

((that was just one time.))

(((she still thinks about that, though.)))

jennie snaps out from her pleasant reverie when the blonde spots her and if it's possible, her eyes glow with adoration as she approaches the older girl.

"hi, hubby," chaeyoung says in a small voice, but still smiling from ear to ear.

jennie melts a little on the inside, "how was practice?"

"tiring as always," the blonde eyes the open arms from jennie and pouts, "can't hug you, too stinky."

"i don't care," she moves her arms again, "hug, rosie."

chaeyoung laughs, shaking her head, and made her way to the adorable dumpling. "how was class?"

"it numbed my brain," jennie breathes in the smell of apples, how unfair that she smells nice after sweating a lot.

"where do you want to eat?" the blonde leans back, her arms still on jennie's waist. "i've got two hours to spare before my next class."

"you pick, but i bought you a snack." jennie points to her bag by the table, "and you don't stink."

"thank you, hubby," chaeyoung says, a bit bashful, then sniffs her sweater, "i do! here, smell."

jennie takes a whiff, and yes, there's a hint of sweat but the apple scented body wash really does take over her senses. "rosie, i really don't think so."

she can't help but laugh out loud as chaeyoung pouts a bit, but she quickly mends it with a kiss, or two, just to see her favorite girl smile. the evident twinkle in chaeyoung's eyes doesn't fail to stutter jennie's heartbeat as the blonde plants a peck on her forehead.

"ew, couple doing couple-y things," jennie hears nayeon comment, followed by lisa's "chaeng, no pda for us singles!"

jennie sighs, already tired to another one of nayeon and lisa combo bullshit. good thing that jisoo currently has classes, or it'll surely be worse when the trio uses their one brain cell together.

"nayeonnie," chaeyoung moves to greet the older girl but was stopped by jennie glaring at her two friends.

"yah! share your girlfriend, mandu!" nayeon jokingly reprimands the frowning brunette.

"why are you here? don't you have somewhere to be?" jennie raises an eyebrow at the older girl.

"she's right, princess," an arm slides by nayeon's waist with a teasing smirk on plastered on her doll-like face. "you do have somewhere to be."

a twitch in nayeon's eyebrows momentarily appears, "stop calling me _that_. and you stink, so please go change."

"okay, pretty girl, i'll stop." sana's smirk widens, then turns to the other three with an amused expressions etched in their faces. she reaches a hand out to jennie, since she's the only one she didn't know, "minatozaki sana, part of j-line; chaengie's frequent partner in interpretative dance; and nayeon's crush for a month in sophomore year."

both ignore nayeon's 'that was a year ago, stop bringing that up!' and jennie shakes sana's hand. who knew that the japanese still does handshakes?

"kim jennie," the brunette says to the fiery haired japanese, "nay didn't mention that last part."

"because it's a year ago and temporary." nayeon stresses out, "and it's not a month! three weeks, sana. three weeks."

the japanese shrugs, still not letting go of nayeon's waist, "do you guys want to have lunch with us?"

chaeyoung eyes jennie, who subtly shakes her head, "sorry unnie, we sort of have plans already."

"yeah, me too, i have a lunch with jisoo unnie." lisa checks her phone and sends a message to her older friend.

"jisoo?" jennie asks, "why?"

"we've been pranked last week by jeongyeon and small chae last week," lisa then pouts sadly at nayeon, "thanks for the no warning, nayeon unnie. so we need to counter a more sophisticated prank, hopefully the type where jeongyeon will cry."

"kids," jennie mumbles under her breathe, and feels bubble of laughter from chaeyoung.

"i heard that unnie," lisa quips, then turns to nayeon with frown and a blush on her cheeks, "sana unnie, i didn't know you have a crush on nayeon unnie."

"she doesn't!" nayeon answers with narrowed eyes, while the japanese grins.

"hate to break it to you, dance machine, i don't," sana sighs, but the look she has on the bunny toothed junior is hard to miss. "we'll get going now, see you guys around!"

jennie gives a smug smirk to nayeon, the oldest gives her a glare but follows the japanese out of the room. she snakes an arm to her girlfriend still talking with lisa. she has a hunch on what sana wants, and secretly cheers for the japanese to accomplish whatever it is, she's trying. after all, she wants the best for nayeon, and maybe sana could give her that.

"ah, that reminds me," lisa suddenly shakes chaeyoung's arm, making jennie slightly dizzy so she leans back. "jennie unnie, we'll drop by your place next week."

"why and why my place?" jennie asks, brows furrowed.

"jisoo unnie insists a sleepover," lisa pouts, "so yours. and we need advice for chaeng and i's duet in next month's auditions."

jennie turns to look at the blonde, "auditions?"

"yes!" chaeyoung excitedly nods, "we're recruiting freshies, so seulgi unnie chose us to do a performance of some sort."

"don't you wanna see chaengie do a sultry dance?" lisa teases and pokes jennie's arm that's around the blonde's slim waist.

jennie swats the thai's hand away, "fine, just call ten minutes ahead."

"why ten minutes?" lisa furrows her brows, confused at the specific time.

"to freshen up," is all jennie says, but what she means is she doesn't want to a repeat to someone catching them on the act. "we're gonna go now, lisa. i can hear this chipmunk's stomach grumbling loudly."

"it's not that loud!" the blonde pouts while the duo laughs.

* * *

jennie taps her left hand in the steering wheel, her other in chaeyoung's thigh, as they drive back to the campus with a very satisfied tummy from their greasy lunch.

(the blonde insisted since she was on a caloric diet for three weeks and misses the unhealthy food. how could jennie even say no to a pouting chipmunk?)

"do you have any plans later, hubby?" chaeyoung flips jennie's hand and plays with her finger.

"just some paperworks," the older steals a glance at the blonde before returning her eyes on the road, "you?"

"have to work on my portfolio, it's due in a couple of days and i'm missing three more drawings." chaeyoung purses her lips, "sadly, i can't stay over at your place again."

"what? why?"

"my plants need me, jennie." the blonde laughs at the sad puppy look on her girlfriend's face. "i can't keep asking my neighbors to water my plants while i'm gone."

"but, heejin and hyunjin don't mind."

"and i do because they're my plants. and the kids are supposed to be studying, not watering plants."

jennie doesn't slip out the fact that she's pretty sure she heard the two 'kids' doing something that definitely doesn't count as 'studying'.

"fine," jennie sulks.

a minute of silence later, chaeyoung starts to giggle. "are you really sulking just because i can't stay over?"

"yes." jennie gruffs, only to feel a gentle pinch on her cheek.

"who would've thought you have this cute side on the unattainable jennie kim?" the blonde plants a kiss on her cheek. "promise, i'll sleep over next week."

"next week?!"

"hubby, my sister pays for the place, the least i could do is live in it. and besides, we're having a sleepover at your place in a week."

jennie groans, "okay, but just so you know, i'm gonna miss sleeping next to you."

"you don't even sleep immediately when we get to bed," chaeyoung laughs at her absurdity.

"well, have you seen yourself?"

"just drive me to class, jennie kim." the blush once again makes an appearance on the blonde.

jennie hums, her hand squeezes chaeyoung's and her heart leaps out when the latter squeezes back.

\------

"so how do you feel about doing it in the car?"

"it's still in public, jennie."

"we're inside the car. and the windows are tinted."

"it's still a no."

"then why'd you say yes in the library?"

"jennie, i swear to kuma-"

"please?"

"..."

"please, wifey?"

"park behind the culinary arts building."

"can i say that 'i parked-"

"no, jennie."

"-park chaeyoung' after?"

 _why did i say yes again?_ chaeyoung groans behind jennie's coat as her girlfriend laughs at her own lame joke.

* * *

"jennie?"

chaeyoung hears a muffled hum on her neck.

"how do you feel about getting your back painted?"

"like those corny things on tumblr?" jennie nibbles at the flushed skin.

"those are not-" chaeyoung suppresses a groan at a hard bite, "-c-corny."

the brunette runs her hand on the toned stomach, while the other supports her weight. "let me guess, you're gonna paint 'starry night' or any van gogh painting in my back for your dorky slambook?"

a small gasp escapes from the blonde's swollen lips, "n-no, my own- i c-can't concentrate with you doing _that."_

"if you get through this with a proper explanation on why it isn't corny, i might say yes." she places another harsh bite just below the blonde's perfect jaw while her hand starts exploring downwards.

chaeyoung didn't finish her sentence, too lost in the daydream sensations that are in a form of jennie kim's fingers, and sadly, neither did jennie, for a strong unlucky force in the universe in the form of kim jisoo and lisa manoban has disrupted her worship-rosie-hours. so, when they came barging inside jennie's bedroom, emphasis on her possession, they are the second and third victims [of the month] to the frightening anger of the cat-eyed chaebol.

"i am so sorry," jisoo apologizes, her gaze still on her friends on the bed.

"if you're sorry, then close the damn door! and stop looking at us, jisoo!" jennie growls under the blanket with chaeyoung, who has her face covered with her hands.

"chaeyoungie," lisa's voice teary, and at that point, jennie isn't sure if it's a joke or not. "she's not innocent anymore! chaeyoungie!"

"do i join or-"

"GET OUT OR I'LL THROW YOUR DAMN DOG OUT OF THE BUILDING."

"hubby, calm down," chaeyoung whispers, her hand on the chubby cheeks. "lisa, can you hear me? i’d like it if you could stop crying and take jisoo out with you, is that okay?"

"yes, it’s okay," lisa sniffles, still solemn her best friend's purity is tainted.

"aw, come on, why do i have to go?" jisoo whines, but still does what her friends say.

they hear the door close, and both girls take in each others' flushed features for both different reasons. jennie, whom was still fuming with anger, and chaeyoung who was covered with shame. and, of course, there's a reason why jennie fell for the blonde who just happens to start laughing.

"what's so funny?" she caresses the flushed cheeks, staring at the blonde's eyes squinted so adorably that her anger for the two idiots depletes rapidly.

"i don't know," chaeyoung finishes, her fingers kneading the chaebol's silky hair. "i love our friends a lot. don't be too hard on them, please?"

jennie leans and traces her lips on the blonde, senses overwhelmingly filled with the scent of her.

"i'll try," she says in between kisses.

"we'll continue later, okay?" chaeyoung gently pushes her away, giggling at her pouting girlfriend. "i don't feel very comfortable when they're aware of it."

"i changed my mind, i'll kill them." jennie indignantly says as the both of them sit up.

the blonde laughs and gives her another kiss, only to pull away when jennie starts to get heated again, "i need clothes right now, or you'll never let me out of bed."

"you don't need it," the stubborn chaebol continues to nip at the blonde's jaw.

"you want me to get out naked and have jisoo see me?" chaeyoung questions, her girlfriend tensing. "lisa's okay, we saw each other buck naked way too many times."

"no," jennie furrows her brows, then begrudgingly stands up and grabs a hoodie of hers that the taller girl can wear. she hands the clothing to chaeyoung who just finished pulling up her underwear.

"thank you, hubby, i'll see you outside," the blonde puts on the hoodie that reaches her thighs and pulls up her sleep shorts. "remember what i said, okay?"

jennie groans, "the things i do for my wifey."

"don't take too long," chaeyoung kisses her still naked girlfriend in the lips, "they might tease me too much."

"fine," jennie sighs at the swollen lips, "get out of here before i take you again."

"i'm going, i'm going!" the blonde laughs aloud, still so lovely, before closing the door, unaware of jennie's plans to release hell fire.

* * *

"lisa, jichu unnie, what do you say to jennie?" chaeyoung calmly asks the duo, refusing to take in the terrifying gaze of the brunette.

as soon as jennie steps out of her room, chaeyoung greeted her with a bowl of milk ice cream, just enough to appease the taunting rage on her two friends for disrupting their moment.

though she'd enjoy the ice cream more if she can taste it on her favorite girl's lips, a bowl will have to do.

they were at the dining table, just enough for six people, with lisa and jisoo seated on the two chairs by the left side; chaeyoung and jennie in the other. she had her arms cross, her knee still beside the blonde's, her gaze unforgiving and unwavering.

"before you say anything else," lisa starts, slowly meeting her unnie's scary eyes, "it's all jisoo's fault!"

"YAH!" jisoo shouts, a shot of betrayal ebbs her skin.

"i told her many times to call you ten minutes ahead, and she just shrugged me off!" the thai dramatically explains, ignoring the look of astonishment of the eldest.

"yah, jendeuk, can you believe this woman? she's such a liar, gosh." jisoo nervously laughs, and meets jennie's gaze, only to look away immediately when she saw that her future might not exist anymore.

lisa let out a horrified gasp, "chaeyoung-ah, i swear i tried to stop her from entering the room!"

"lisa, what did i say earlier?" the blonde coolly asks, her hand immediately on jennie's pinkie, foreboding the rising irritation from her.

"right," lisa tugs jisoo's arm, cuing her to do the 'thing'.

jisoo resists the groan bubbling in the bottom of her throat. _why is jennie so damn dramatic? people get caught having sex all the time!_

"repeat that again, kim jisoo-yah." jennie darkly says. the blonde rubs her head, _so much for practice._

_crap_ , did she say it out loud? jisoo sends a telepathic message to her friends, family, the nice old lady that gives her two extra honey-glazed chicken, and dalgom, bidding them farewell because she might as well consider herself dead if she opens her mouth one more time and say the wrong words.

"i was joking," jisoo passively tries to save her life once more by 'hehe'-ing her way out of this, "we're really sorry, jendeuk, we won't open go here without calling ever again."

' _we?_ ' lisa mouths to jisoo, who sends her a look of 'just-go-with-it'.

"what else?" jennie sternly questions.

"uhm," lisa eyes chaeyoung, who shrugs in return, then to jisoo who also looks equally lost. "we're sorry we didn't close the door immediately?"

"are you asking or apologizing?"

"apologizing," the thai quickly answers, and for the final strike so she can get out of that terrifying gaze, she bows ninety degrees, "i'm really sorry, unnie!"

lisa thanks buddha and all the gods above that she chose not to do a 'hurt my best friend and i'll slice you open' talk with jennie because first of all, she's very intimidating, and secondly, she thinks that jennie is the type of person who won't hurt anybody intentionally and unintentionally. and lastly, she has never seen chaeyoung so bubbly and perky and happy. like, times two hundred. it's kind of sickening how bright her best friend is all the time. (just kidding.)

and based on her observation on jennie these couple of weeks ever since they started going out, she never saw any ill-mannered actions that would show that she doesn't care for chaeyoung. lisa knows that jennie cares, and she cares a lot. from accompanying her to community centers to giving her a flower at times. lisa always wishes the best for chaeyoung, and maybe, she already has it.

_but, she's so freaking intimidating, what kind of simulation is this?_

"lisa-yah," at the sound of her name, she stands up and sees jennie shrug it off.

"it's okay, just don't do it again."

"told you she'll let us off easily," jisoo haughtily grins at the thai.

"i said lisa's name, not yours." jennie snaps, "what else do you need to apologize?"

"uh," the eldest pauses, dumbfounded at the ridiculous notion of having more faults.

"hubby, you need to say it or she's never gonna get it," chaeyoung whispers to the brunette, though everyone can hear it. including jisoo who pouts. "i'm getting kind of hungry too."

jisoo stares as jennie's eyes went soft on the blonde, then nods, and turns to her; gaze already terrifying again. _daebak, her duality._

her stupid self demands that she should tease her best friend right now, regardless of the possibility that she might get kicked out of the apartment. but, she can't do that because it's so boring by herself. this is why she demanded a sleepover with the four of them because they click the most ever since the start of band practice.

"you wanted to join us, jisoo," jennie sneers, "what the heck was that?"

"aish," jisoo waves it away, "it's just pure joke, jendeukie! i mean, unless chaeyoung offers-"

"what?!"

"jisoo unnie," chaeyoung sighs, "not helping."

the eldest closes her mouth, hand itching to slap lisa's head for laughing, and clears her throat, "that was a joke too!"

jennie raises an eyebrow, clearly not amused by the slightest.

"i'm really sorry, mandu," jisoo pulls an aegyo, "jendeukie, i'm so sorry!"

this time, chaeyoung and lisa doesn't even try to stifle their laughs and lets it out, loudly. jennie cringes, but her heart warms at the blonde's laugh, and she relents. but, not before seeing a little unnerveness from the 'jokester', kim jisoo.

"i'll forgive you," jennie starts, uncrosses her arms and grabs her phone on chaeyoung's hoodie pocket. "if you let me pick an embarrassing video and show it to the girls."

jisoo's eyes widen and nervously laughs, "yah, jendeuk, let's not get too personal."

"you saw us naked," she glares, "how much more personal is this compared to what you saw earlier?"

"and i applaud the both of you for being fit despite the busy schedule, but is it really necessary?"

"yes."

"damn, no hesitation or whatsoever."

"you went inside my home without calling me first."

"it's not my fault your bedroom isn't locked!"

"yes, because it's my own apartment!"

"that i own!"

"your parents own it, not you!"

"chu unnie," chaeyoung rubs her head as jisoo stares at her apologetically, "just say yes. how bad could it be?"

\------

"i can't believe you did that, unnie," lisa mutters after a few seconds, turning to the figure under the blanket by the couch.

"ms. sunmi is so strict with us, yet you managed to-" chaeyoung lets out a breathe, "daebak."

"it's the 'kim jisoo print'," jennie proudly smirks beside the blonde.

jisoo lets out a groan of shame, "that was a long time ago, stop saying that print shit, jennie!"

"you really gave ms. sunmi a lap dance," lisa slowly claps, "i give you one million kudos!"

"and minus another million for puking on her after." the blonde laughs, pulling the blanket over her and jennie's legs.

"but she gains half a million despite of the puking incident, jisoo managed to go home with her." jennie shares, a smug look on her face as jisoo lifts her blanket and glares at her.

"freshmen welcome party was wild, okay?" jisoo sits beside lisa and picks up another chicken from the box. "i didn't know she teaches here, otherwise, i would've said no."

lisa stares at her in disbelief, "really? you'd say no?"

"yeah, but if she asks me two more times, i'd say ‘yes please.’" the eldest takes a bite from the chicken, and turns to jennie. "so-"

"no," jennie glares, "you're not allowed to ask about earlier."

jisoo turns to chaeyoung who shakes her head, "sorry, unnie, privacy."

"just two questions! i promise i won't ask ever again." the older kim crosses her heart.

chaeyoung veers, eyes pleading a bit, at jennie, who heavily sighs, knowing all too well that her girlfriend can't say no to her. "fine, but lisa has to ask the other question, to be fair."

"lisa, don't you fail me now." jisoo dramatically holds the thai's wrist, who blindly nods in return.

"why do i feel like i'm gonna regret it?" jennie says under her breathe, and feels chaeyoung's shoulder shake.

"i'd be fun," chaeyoung rests her head on the brunette's shoulder, "knowing jisoo unnie, they're probably discussing which question would we share the most."

"then we should answer yes or no,"

"you really want to hear chu unnie's aegyo on why you shouldn't do that?"

jennie clicks her tongue, "let's keep it short and classy."

"afraid of their questions, hubby?" the blonde teases.

"not at all," she grins, and lays a kiss on chaeyoung's cheek.

"first question," jisoo announces as soon as they sat on the floor. "lisa, drum roll please!"

jennie rolls her eyes at the dramatics, while chaeyoung giggles at lisa's ridiculous tapping on the couch.

"chaeyoung-ah!"

"ye!" the blonde raises her fork, eyes bright with mirth and excitement.

"are you a bottom or a top?"

"jisoo unnie!" chaeyoung, now horrified at how straight to the point her friends were, groans and asks jennie for help, but her girlfriend shakes her head with a lazy grin on her lips. clearly enjoying the first question.

"that's okay, chaengie! you can answer it!" lisa cheers for her best friend.

chaeyoung pouts, a flush already climbing on her neck, "okay, don't laugh but, i used to top."

"daebak!" jisoo belts out a laugh while lisa slaps her hand on the sofa, also laughing.

jennie stares lovingly at the shy blonde, the tips of her ear already red, as she continues to pout.

"and you bottomed for jendeukie?" jisoo continues her roar of laughter.

"i asked you guys not to laugh," chaeyoung mutters, and turns to jennie who looks at her with extreme fondness that she feels her face heating up again.

"guys, that's enough," jennie says, and the two slowly ceased their chuckles, "you really wanna make rosie cry?"

jisoo wipes her tears away, "no, of course not, but chaengie, for jennie really?"

"yah! what's wrong with me?"

lisa chugs her mango juice before answering jennie, "unnie, you don't know this but chaeyoungie hates being a bottom. like her previous relationship, she tops all the time."

”lisa, you make it sound as if i’m controlling!” the blonde whines, still red with embarrassment.

"really?" the brunette turns to her girlfriend, "i didn't know that."

"wait, there's more!" lisa grins, purposely ignoring the blonde's protests. "one time, we met up at a cafe and she came in with a scarf wrapped around her neck, and it was really hot that day! so i asked, 'what happened to you?', and she said, 'lisa-yah, i bottomed the other day.', and she was like really red!"

"is that so?" jennie bites her lip, she slips her fingers with chaeyoung's.

lisa nods enthusiastically, "and i asked, 'how was it?', and she went all shy and shit and said, 'it's really good, i don't know why i hated being bottom.'"

jisoo laughs out loud once again, "did she tell you who it was?"

"that's the thing," lisa points to chaeyoung, "you never told me who!"

"who do you think it was, lisa?" the blonde answers back, now hiding in jennie's hood.

"no way," jisoo laughs in disbelief, "it was jennie?!"

"unnie," lisa says in a serious tone, "i'm really proud of you for making her a bottom. it means you're doing a great job."

"lalisa, you don't need to complement her!" jisoo pats the thai's back, "from what we saw and heard earlier, she knows she's good at it."

"please, kill me." chaeyoung mumbles on her hoodie cuffs.

"still think this is fun, wifey?" jennie teases back.

"no," the blonde shakes her head, hiding her face on the older girl's neck.

\------

it was nearing midnight and the four girls were starting to get sleepy due to their talkative nature and food coma. chaeyoung now has arms around jennie, both of them watching gordon ramsay's easy and quick recipes on youtube in the blonde's phone, while jisoo and lisa were sprawled on the carpet, also in their phones. it was a few minutes later when jisoo suddenly sits up, and pats lisa's leg.

"we have one more question!"

"oh right," lisa sits up too, "jennie unnie, you're up."

jennie groans, "i was hoping you'd forget about that."

"and miss a chance at getting a blackmail?" jisoo asks indecrously, "you think we're that dumb?"

"yes." jennie deadpans, and the duo dramatically places their hand on their chest. in sync. _these idiots._

"you can do it, wifey!" chaeyoung sets her phone beside her lap, and cuddles jennie more.

"fire away," jennie says, too comfortable in the warm embrace of her girlfriend.

lisa clears her throat and grabs the tv remote, "ms. kim jennie, due to popular demand, here is your question."

"they're so cute," jennie hears the blonde, and though she'd never say it in front of them, her friends really are.

"who is more sweet? you or chaeyoung?" the gray haired thai hands over the remote, and jennie resists rolling her eyes, but still takes it from her hands.

"is this mic on?" she jokes, and chaeyoung laughs. "thank you for the question. the answer is-"

"jennie!" the blonde answers, eyes squinted in a charming manner, cheeks flushed pink due to the soju they've been drinking, and jennie falls even more.

jisoo struggles not to laugh, and jennie couldn't bring herself to care. she'd gladly take any teasing from jisoo just to keep seeing that absolutely breathtaking smile from chaeyoung.

"please, explain thoroughly, chaeyoung-ah," lisa says formally, another remote in her hand.

chaeyoung takes the remote in jennie's hand, "okay, so we all know that jennie unnie has a intimidating aura, and that only a few people are able to see what lies behind the pretty face."

shouts of agreement came, and jennie chuckles, even she can't deny that.

"but for me, the first time i saw jennie, i felt safe," the blonde stares at jennie, who also happens to be doing the same. "and over the weeks that i've known her, she always takes care of me. whether be giving me hand in mixing paints to fetching me from practices, she's always been looking out for me."

chaeyoung reminisces the first time jennie gave her a flower. it was just after the confession, and they were walking back to their places when they stopped in a flower shop just about to close. she remembers jennie letting go of her hand to run towards the shop, and buying a single stem of daisy. on how she walked back to her with her signature gummy smile, almost bashful, and chaeyoung could feel her heart flutter.

jennie may be appear to be intimidating or distant or even cold, but deep down, she's one of the sweetest person chaeyoung met. and it shows through her actions alone.

at any time of the day, jennie would always hold her hand, or the bottom of her spine, or even just her pinkie! and with that, chaeyoung consistently felt that she's safe and cared for. a feat that nobody had come across to, in a romantic sense.

there are times where jennie would leave little notes in her notebooks, sometimes in her coffee mug and her box of paintbrushes. a sticky note filled with words that never fails to make chaeyoung's heart race.

sometimes, she'd watch her paint, her gaze only focused in chaeyoung, and usually, it makes her uncomfortable, but never to jennie.

there are moments where chaeyoung would suddenly sing because her brain started playing a tune, and jennie will drop whatever she's doing just to hear her sing. with her coffee irised overflowing with fascination and wander, and that honestly makes chaeyoung feel exceptional, knowing that jennie, the unattainable princess of a multimillionaire company, only has her eyes on her.

she often wonders when would it be the right time to say that she loves her.

tomorrow? next week? in a month?

whenever it may be, she hopes jennie will feel the same.

"so, yeah, it's jennie for me." chaeyoung says, hoping that jennie reads in between the lines.

and if jennie's eyes brightening doesn't indicate that she did, then chaeyoung doesn't really know anything else.

"that's disgustingly cute," jisoo interrupts, while lisa sniffles.

"i'm so happy, you guys found each other and fixed your shit." the thai dancer rubs her nose. "you guys think all the pining you did before the fair wasn't obvious?"

"jennie was so pathetic back then," jisoo laughs, ignoring the glare of the said girl. "she really made these sad faces when practice was over and she couldn't see chaeng."

lisa taps jisoo's arm, "unnie, chaeyoungie too! she gets sad when she doesn't get to stare at jennie doing paperworks anymore!"

"watch them exchange how pathetic we were back then for an hour." jennie lays her head on the blonde's shoulder.

"it is kind of funny," chaeyoung laughs, "i like this."

"this what?"

"this," chaeyoung mumbles over jisoo and lisa's loud voices, "just us four, together like this."

"you're getting sappy, rosie."

"i mean it!" the blonde pouts, watching her girlfriend chuckle under her breathe.

"yeah, i know what you mean." jennie smiles.

whatever preconceived notion about what truly the meaning of life is, it doesn't concern jennie at all. for her, being surrounded with her closest friends, and her favorite girl, she's alright with this life. she hopes that she'll continue to have this, because as long as she has them, she's content.

especially with chaeyoung by her side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and that’s a wrap!!! AAAAAA (kinda feel nostalgic) i love ot4 silly moments ㅜㅜ
> 
> i decided not to put the part of them exchanging the legendary “eight words, three syllables, say it and i’m yours” kind of shit bc my babies are still on the early stages of the relationship. (but i will post one!! in the near future!!)
> 
> and the open ending is kind of necessary bc im planning (hopefully i can like really pan this story out and focus on the other characters) to add more chapters in the future. like, if i get hit by a truck of inspiration or sumn, i’ll add it fr.
> 
> i really hope you like this chapter bc im like slightly nervous by it. writing definitive endings is a weak point of mine, and i always opt for an open ending bc i strongly stand with the reader’s imagination on how they want it to end.
> 
> i still might post more chapters here (lol) and i hope u guys are excited for the angst chaennie !! i fr cried yesterday while typing it out idk tragedy really gets me going like i live for that angsty shit bc it’s so real and it hurts a lot LMAO
> 
> chaennie will always be my babies ㅜㅜ
> 
> ANYWAYS, GUYS THE TEASERS?? 24/365??? MAENG GETTING FIRED??? living my life.
> 
> i hope you guys stay safe!! and i’m still open for constructive criticism!! i like getting hurt and improving after crying it out (jk but fr u can criticize my works)
> 
> if anyone wants to like ask questions and shit, or message any prompts they see anywhere, you can dm me in my twt!! it’s @herviolets <3
> 
> (im so sorry this is long again ily)


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